Wednesday 18 November 2009

I Wear T-Shirts

But she wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts
She's cheer captain and I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming bout the day when you'll wake up and find
That what you're lookin for has been here the whole time
-You Belong With Me, Taylor Swift

I bumped into a high school friend the other day, who reminded me that we're due for our 10 year reunion in 4 years (really scary, now that I think about it, considering I feel like I still haven't really done anything with my life). We started talking about the people we went to high school with, and I was reminded of my first high school crush.

I asked him out in year 11, and it was one of the hardest things for me to do. Though I was rejected, one thing I'll always remember about him was how I asked if he could tell me that he already had a girlfriend or he was gay to make me feel better, and he told me he was gay. To be honest, it didn't make me feel all that much better at the time, but right now I think it was really nice of him.

The reason why I liked him so much was because we had so much in common. Of all the people in high school, I'd say he and his best friend would have been the biggest geeks I had ever met at the time (then I decided to do Software Engineering at uni, and the people I've met since have completely blown them out of the water). Although I think he had a bit of a cruel streak, he was funny, nice and a geek, what more could you want from a guy? The crushing part was when I found out later in the year that he had dated some bitch a slut Nicole Lemonhead (that wasn't her actual name, but that's what people called her. I didn't get it at the time, but in retrospect, I can see that she was so sour). I hated her, we were complete opposites and I can't remember what it was, but there was some class where she asked me for an answer to something, and I pretended I didn't know it, and from that point onwards, she called me dumb (although she changed schools in year 9, so it wasn't a long lasting thing) despite the fact that her clique would call my clique "squares" since we were the typical Asian students. I think if anything, they would have been the trailer trash, Britney-esque clique, which might seem cruel, but from what I've heard about how most of them ended up, not so far from the truth. =/ (*meow* claws come out? No, that's about as mean as I'm going to be, it has been almost 10 years since I've seen her. Besides, it's not nice to fight someone who isn't going to fight back.)

OK, blast from the past over, the bit I never understood was why he dated her and not me considering the fact that Nicole and I are so different, and if we're going to play the "Similiarities Game", I think I would have won by a landslide. Then of course, I heard the Taylor Swift song at work, and I thought to myself, "What guy wouldn't choose a short skirt-wearing, pom-pom-shaking, hot chick riding up and down on him over a T-shirt wearing, geeky girl who wants to co-ordinate a reaver drop with him?"

One big difference between being friends with someone and being in a relationship with them is the physical side of things. There are exceptions (ie. FWBs), but in most cases, there are things you just don't do with friends that you would only do with someone you're in a relationship. Personally, I think kissing someone you're just friends with is a bit weird, but that seems to be really common in Western cultures. (Although there was this one time I went out with some WoW people, and one of them offered me a beer. I drank it and was feeling weird, so I said I wanted to go and they said they were leaving, too so we all left and I ended up kissing one of them goodbye, but Charmleon dragged me away, so I'm glad I didn't do anything else! =/ So maybe it's something that's common in beer drinking cultures?) So if you really had to choose between the two, you could have the best of both worlds and date the hot one and be friends with the one who likes the same things you do.

Again, I'm going to bring up that thing Julian said to me ages ago, about friends being people that you have things in common with, and your partner being someone that complements you. So while I did have so much in common with that guy, I don't think that meant we would work well together in a relationship, just as friends (although I haven't talked to him since my 21st (my actual 21st, not my 22nd and 2/3), so I guess not) and maybe Nicole Lemonhead had some quality characteristic that made her better suited to him (probably the fact that she would fit a cheerleader outfit better than I can).

Still, I'm happy in the relationship I'm in now, and I think I have the best of both worlds, (someone I'm both physically and mentally attracted to, though I have yet to see MrMan5.5 in a cheerleader outfit) so it all worked out well in the end.

T-shirts for life!

Monday 9 November 2009

If We Ever Get Married....

Short blog today, exam tomorrow. T_T I always wondered why it was a big deal to invite someone you're dating to a wedding. Apparently it's a stage you get to in a relationship, and inviting someone to a wedding has certain implications about the seriousness of the relationship. I guess if it's a family wedding, then there is the whole meeting the parents, siblings and entire extended family (which is never a good thing - hi cousins Andrew and Simon!), but what if it's one of your friends who is getting married? That shouldn't really matter, right, because you're just bringing along a date so that if you get stuck at the table with your friend's grandmother who doesn't speak English very well, you know you're not going to be sandwiched on the other side by your friend's aunt from Romania who thinks it's appropriate to yell at people and give them the evil eye. You're also gauranteed to have someone you find interesting to talk to.

That was what I thought until i went to Julian's wedding, which MrMan5.5 was also invited to. It was a good wedding (if you ignore the random Asian tourists that kinda crashed it T_T), and I'm glad MrMan5.5 was there, but it did change something in our relationship. After the wedding, we started joking and saying things like, "If we ever get married, we have to have ________ at our wedding." A few of the things are things we thought were awesome at Julian's wedding, but there are other things that have popped up that are just random things.

I don't think it's a bad thing, I actually like that we're comfortable enough with each other to be able to make jokes like that. We're not getting engaged or anything, but I can kinda see now how that could have a bad effect on a relationship if one person thinks the relationship is more serious than the other does.