A few years ago, someone at work challenged me to a 3v1 Dota 2 match. We have an open office, so I imagine other people heard us discussing it. At the time, I said that I was average at the game (which I think is true given my rating was around 4000). Fast forward to a couple of months ago, when I organised a team Counter-Strike: GO night at the request of one of the devs on my team. I mentioned that I was rubbish at the game, and he said that he had heard I said I was average at Dota 2, and then I won a 3v1 game, so he thought I was just being modest about my FPS skills. I was not, and was definitely dumpster tier on the night (not that it mattered, because everyone had a great time).
It got me thinking, how do you respond to the question, "How good are you?" Ever since I started playing with the Kiwi stack, I've definitely felt bottom-tier in terms of my Dota 2 skills. Then again, that's a pretty biased view, given that most of them are divine / immortal rank. It would be like being the worst player on a VFL football team - sure, you might be bad at that level, but you're probably still ahead of a large number of people who play on amateur teams. You are the 1%.
Well... not quite. Based on my last badge (Ancient 7, which I guess is now Ancient 5), I was in the top 7% based on these opt-in stats from Open Dota users. But I still feel reluctant to say I'm good at the game because I don't honestly feel like I am. Part of it is probably the whole "I know that I know nothing" idea - I've seen just how good people are at the top end and it feels like they're so far away from me. I learn new things just from watching them play.
At a different work event, someone found out that I played HoN (it was a long time ago). He asked me how good I was and I told him my PSR. He replied with his, and I nearly said, "I didn't know it could be that low." But I didn't, and asked him what kind of heroes he liked to play. We spoke a bit, and he kept saying, "Oh, but I bet things are different at your level" which made me feel really awkward. I really feel like I was average at that game, and it wasn't until Dota 2 when I put a lot of effort into improving.
I also think about a story a friend told me about when he found out someone he worked with also played Hearthstone. He asked her what kind of deck she played and she replied, "The blue one". He got the impression that she only played casually as she couldn't remember which class (is that what they're called? I don't play) her deck was. I don't remember the names of most of the spells in the game, especially for the heroes that I don't play. I mean, I recognise them when I see them, so if someone pings that it's on cooldown, I know what they mean, but what's the name of Juggernaut's spin? No clue. What's the name of Monkey King's long stick hitty ability? Wouldn't have the foggiest. Which ability is in Anti-Mage's second ability slot? *blank stare* And this is a game I've put thousands of hours into. Filthy casual, indeed! (But in all seriousness, there are things that I should really know, but don't, like how much gold Black King Bar is off the top of my head.)
So I'm often quite reluctant to say with confidence that I'm "good". Especially when I read online about how women are often quizzed about games in order to prove that they're a "real" gamer. Though I don't think it's happened to me recently. I've been asked about games I play, and people will follow up with questions like, "Which class do you play?" for MMOs, or "Who are your favourite heroes?" for Dota, but they seem like reasonable questions that aren't for the purpose of gatekeeping.
Back to the original question! I could respond with something that is objective, like, "I've played for 4,000 hours, or my MMR is 4000" (is there a link between number of hours played and MMR? Will my MMR shoot up if I play more?!), but what does that mean to someone who doesn't play? One of my co-workers told me that he received a resume where the person listed their MMR in Dota 2. He didn't know what to make of the information so he asked me.
Depending on the other person, I might be a bit ashamed to reveal just how many hours I've put into the game. Is that the wrong mindset to have? They say that it takes 10,000 hours to master something, and 4,000 hours is a reasonable chunk of the way there. If someone told me they have spent 4,000 hours playing basketball, I'd be impressed - so what's wrong with spending 4,000 hours playing a computer game? Regardless, it's still not a good indicator, as it doesn't really give an indication of the quality of those hours. I could have spent 4,000 hours in the hero browsing screen looking at cosmetics (not talking about anyone in particular).
Let's rewind a bit, and think about why someone would ask such a question. They might be trying to make conversation, and lacking anything else to ask, they asked that. Personally, I think it's a strange question. Using basketball again, if someone mentioned they played basketball, I wouldn't ask how good they are. I might ask if they're part of a team / league, and how often they play. But that's probably because I don't know much about basketball. In any case, an in-depth answer about how good or bad you are probably isn't that interesting to them.
Someone might ask because they also play, and they're looking for someone to play with. And they're an elitist jerk who only wants to play with people who are the same level as them. (Still not talking about anyone in particular.)
In either case, I think the best solution is to answer the same way people answer the question, "How are you?": "Not bad, how about you?" If they don't play, they'll respond that they don't play and you can move on to another topic of conversation, or explain the game to them at a basic level if they seem interested. If they do play and they're an elitist jerk, they'll let you know pretty quickly, and you haven't wasted time telling them about your skill since they don't care anyway. And if they do want someone to play with, and don't care about your level, it opens them up to asking for your gaming details.
And by saying "not bad", you leave yourself a bit of space. If it turns out that they're really good at the game, then you haven't given them the impression that you're on their level. If they're really bad at the game, you don't make them feel awkward about it.
