A break from DotA related things today, as I realised there might be a bit of information overload. This is an O.5 post, bordering on R, so read at your peril! For my DotA players in training, try to focus on picking a role, and learning a few heroes who can perform that role.
Yesterday (4 days ago now, as I stopped writing mid-post) I learned that a penis is actually partly spongy, courtesy of Very Demotivational Posters and Wikipedia. It makes sense, as, if hentai is to be believed, there must be some way for guys to hide something that can grow to the size of an adult human's arm in teenage boy gym shorts. I remember watching something linked to me years ago where the premise was this guy was the "Chosen One" because his penis could grow to accommodate whatever girl was trying to please him. There was a club at the school that controlled the school, and members of the club could do whatever they wanted. The head of the club was this girl who had to give this new guy a blow job to be promoted to something else, but failed, because his penis was too big. So they're afraid he was the one spoken of in prophecies who would bring down the club with his huge dick, and so they send all of their members to try and get him to orgasm, but they all fail as he pleasures them too well and they fall over in exhaustion. I'm sure the plot was better than that, but I don't remember it that well.
One particular scene sticks in my head though, they're in a classroom when three of the girls try to seduce this guy. They grab him and throw him against a wall. One of the girls begins to suck his cock, and he starts to moan. But as she continues, she starts to struggle as he's getting bigger and bigger. Eventually, she starts choking, and she can't take it anymore, so she stops.
At first, I just passed it off as "those crazy Japanese, what will they think of next?" as nothing like that would ever happen in real life. I don't think I've ever seen a form-matching penis, but I have watched a lot more porn since then, and only now that I've started to think about it, it does happen quite a lot. Well, by a lot, I mean in the subset of porn that I enjoy watching the most - porn that focuses mainly on blowjobs (although it leaves me open to my nemesis: a2m). On a side note, after this picture Julian linked, I feel quite proud that I think I'm still what would be considered vanilla despite being spending as much time on the Internet as I do. On a side note of that side note, despite what I said about wanting to make people feel more comfortable about their fetishes, I think I am going to stop myself from ever asking someone what their fetish is. I was just thinking, that despite the fact that Graham and I share quite a lot on this topic, and do a lot of discussing, I don't want to know what his fetish is.
I mean, what if his fetish is having short, Asian girls come up to him saying that they're sick of being unsatisfied by Asian dicks, and they want him to show them what a real man is like, when he pulls out his gatling gun-sized penis and later they conquer China together. Now that I think about it, he seems to like collecting short, Asian, female friends, and what if during our entire friendship, he was just subconsciously planting the idea in our heads - and isn't the fact that I just thought of this proof of his scheme?! So now this is what I'll think of when I think of Graham, and not only that, if I ever see him with a short, Asian female, I'll wonder whether he genuinely wants them as a friend, or if he is just biding his time. This stuff can ruin friendships!
Back to the original topic, I've seen a few videos where you look at how big the guy is, and you think there is no way he could fit in her mouth, but she manages somehow. Only she only bobs down twice, and has to go back to licking again. Then she'll try again, and she might last a bit longer this time, but still not very long. Then later, the guy will push her head down, and you can tell she's struggling, because now she sounds like she's choking. I wonder if they have to sign waivers or something - occupational hazard: large, erect penises. It's also not like she can call out a safe word if she's in trouble or something, because, well, for one, it's rude to talk with your mouth full. It seems dangerous, there was one video I was watching where the girl seemed to be in tears, and I couldn't keep watching as I was starting to get worried it'd turn into a snuff film.
On the other hand, I have great respect for the girls who are able to follow through. I'm envious of the level of self-control they seem to have. Although RH assured me that unless I had just eaten a lot of food, deep throating will at worst cause dry-retching, if I feel even slightly like I'm going to throw up, I have to stop. I don't know how my mum expected me to become a doctor, as I have such a weak stomach. I actually started feeling queasy when Albert was talking about finding hairs in your food.
I wonder if I should add vomiting to my grad bio in my list of skills. My manager wants me to add all these skills that I really don't think I have, and after Albert's failed stint as a Java developer, I'm afraid of ending up somewhere where they think I'm able to do stuff that I can't.
Whoa, this post jumped around a lot. I guess that is what happens when you try to continue the train of thought from 4 days ago... Sorry everyone for the mess!
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