Friday 15 August 2008

Bloated

I'm so fat that...

... if the people of China were to lie head to toe, they wouldn't make it around the size of my waist.

... when I jumped for joy, my feet didn't leave the ground.

... a dinosaur took residence inside my body and was excited about how spacious it is.

... a mathematician and an architect tried to draw up a blueprint of my insides and ran out of numbers while trying to measure the length of one wall.

... the force of my jumping into the Pacific ocean is enough to displace all of the water in it.

... A'Tuin walked over my tummy once, and I didn't even notice it was there.

... my BMI is larger than the number of bits Google stores.

... they sent me to the moon once, to try and get me to lose some weight (there's no food on the moon T_T), but all I did was create a whole bunch of craters.



If anyone is wondering what inspired this, I ate a medium pounder (a double quarter pounder with two extra patties and no cheese) meal from McDonald's on Tuesday and still haven't recovered. My body is so full of oil. T_T


2 comments:

Anonymous said...

your body is punishing you for eating ridiculous amounts of meat in one sitting :P

Fodder said...

I would have stood up and walked around for a bit while eating, but after getting through half of the burger, my body refused to move. T_T