South Sea Island

Pushy sales tactics aside, the cruise itself was amazing.

It's run by a company called South Sea Cruises:

They had a few different cruises available, full-day, half-day, Finding Nemo and some island hopping one. The full-day includes a ferry ride from Port Denaru to South Sea Island and back, buffet lunch, snorkel, paddleboard and kayak hire, the opportunity to do the "submarine" tour, reef snorkelling, volleyball, and if you want to pay a bit extra, scuba diving and massage. There's also a pool on the island, but I didn't try it, as we had this wonderful beach to swim at! The half-day is the same, except you only get half of the day (from 12pm-6). The Finding Nemo tour involves travelling on a boat with a glass bottom, that lets you see the fish underwater. The island hopping one is a ferry ride around a heap of islands in the area, where you can hop off for a brief look at each island.

We were leaving Nadi that day, so we only had time for the half-day.

The island was really nice. It's not that big, you could walk around the entire island in about 5 minutes. The sand was a bit rocky, with bits of dried out coral in it, but mostly it was nice and soft. The water was amazing - nice and calm, really warm, and when we had the snorkelling gear, you could swim around seeing all the fish. My sister got some video footage of some fish jumping out of the water, but we didn't manage to find any of those.

It was my first time snorkelling outside of a swimming pool, and it's more fun than I thought it would be. I had my mask on wrong at the start, and my nose was exposed, so I ended up inhaling a heap of water, but once that was fixed, I got the hang of it pretty quickly. I never quite managed to do that thing where you blow the water out of your snorkel when you resurface, but I just took it out of my mouth and upended it before returning under water. I'm not very good at being a fish. :(

Note: There is a limited supply of snorkels, so if you want to go on one of the reef snorkelling trips, it's a good idea to collect your gear about an hour before you go out. This also gives you some time to practice snorkelling on the shore if you've never snorkelled before, rather than making the same mistake I did and thinking I'd be fine out at the reef.

The most fun I had on the island was kayaking. I somewhat enjoyed canoeing while on school camps, but found it exhausting after a while. Now that I'm a lot more fit than I was back then, kayaking was quite enjoyable - a nice combination of active and relaxing at the same time. It was a bit imbalanced, as MrFodder is stronger than me, so we would never go in a straight line, but it was straight enough.

The buffet lunch included some BBQ meats, fried rice, vegetable salad, bread rolls, potato salad, and fruit salad. During lunch, they had a Fijian musical troupe performing some dances and playing songs. It was fun to watch. I think they like to mess around with tourists, as they came up to us and pretended to hit us with their weapons, stopping just short of making contact.

(He was right in front of me when I took that photo.)

It was fun to watch them dance, and I enjoyed watching their feet and how little sand they kicked up despite how fast they were moving and how much they were jumping up and down. Meanwhile, people were fleeing the island from the amount of sand I was kicking up when trying to move around with flippers on (someone eventually told me that it'd be easier if I just walked backwards).

The had hammocks around the island for you to nap in after eating a filling lunch, as well as some lounge chairs under umbrellas.

I thought the half-day was too short, as we only had time for eating, kayaking, a bit of swimming and snorkelling before we had to leave. I had a great time though, and it's definitely my favourite part of the whole trip.

South Sea Seminar

While on the topic of slimy sales tactics, in Fiji, my brother saw a deal where you could go on a cruise for $10 per couple, rather than $398. The only catch is that you need to attend a 90-minute sales seminar.

Since my family had already booked theirs in, MrFodder and I had the option of paying the full amount, or attending the seminar. The amount didn't matter all that much to us, but from what my brother told us, it sounded like a pyramid scheme-type seminar, so I was really curious about what they'd do. Unlike my last involvement with someone trying to get me involved in one of those marketing things, I wouldn't have any involvement with the salesperson, so I could view it with the perspective of an outsider.

My brother told us that we were not supposed to know each other. It sounded really weird, my family went as a group to sign up, and the woman said she wasn't supposed to do large groups, as they preferred just couples, but she'd make an exception. They ruled out any couple that had a combined income of less than $80k AUD (though no actual proof of income is required) and any couple under the age of 25. They also asked if we had dependants, but I'm not sure what that had to do with anything. The interesting thing is that the woman at the registration counter kept emphasising how we were being invited to the seminar, and that not everyone was able to get an invitation.

On the day of the seminar, MrFodder and I were picked up from near our hotel by a shuttle bus and taken to a resort. It was actually quite beautiful.

They also kindly offered tea, coffee and morning tea.

Rather than being in a large group, we were assigned a sales consultant and it was just a three of us at a table. The first part was a questionnaire. She asked us certain demographic questions again, like our age brackets, combined income bracket (which seemed to be grouped into < $50k, $50-80k, $80-100k, 100k+). Then we were asked some questions about our vacation habits - where we've been in the past 3 years, how long we tend to travel for, how much we spend, whether we thought holidays would become more or less expensive, how important holidays are to us. When we said that we only travelled every few years, she seemed shocked. We said that going away for a holiday isn't a big priority for us - in fact, we mostly prefer just relaxing at home.

She confessed to us that she was divorced. She and her husband were on opposite shifts at work, and barely spent time together. Before she knew it, he was cheating on her and the marriage was a shambles. She quit her job to try and patch things up, but it was too little, too late. If she had the chance to re-do things, she would have tried to put more effort into spending quality time together. She added that her father had passed away recently, and that life is short, so you should enjoy it while you can.

She then moved on to talking about some of our ideal vacations, if money were no object, where would we like to go, what would we like to do. Her boss came over, and emphasised that this product isn't for everyone, and that they would not pressure us to make a purchase at all.

We'd been there for about 30 minutes at that point, and she finally got around to explaining what the product actually was: the minimum package nets you 12,000 credits per year, which you can spend on accommodation at any of the hotels in their network. Unlike regular holidays, where you spend money on accommodation and it's gone, these credits are refreshed, so you can use them year after year, or if you don't want to go on a holiday every year, you can rollover credits for up to three years, and also borrow credits from future years, combining them to make a bigger holiday - so you could theoretically spend 48,000 points per vacation.

Before she could finish, they grabbed everyone in the group and put us a room together to show us a video (it was a pretty small group, there were 4 couples in total). MrFodder found the video incredibly cringe-worthy and cheesy, but I thought it was an educational experience.

The video did a really good job trying to pull the heartstrings. There were many shots of a "family" (it looked pretty fake, so I'm sure they're all actors) at the beach, happily enjoying themselves. Making memories. Then they had some testimonials from "happy customers who had purchased more points". You can use the points yourself, or gift them to a family member or friend. What really threw me was that the testimonials they had all seemed to point out that the people had bought additional points. I'm sure the intention was for it to show that those people actually do enjoy the product, but all it really said to me was that your yearly allocation of points isn't enough to have a decent holiday, and it's likely you'll need to spend even more. MrFodder's favourite part of the video was the CEO of the company cooking sausages on a BBQ, giving a sausage to his son, then doing the whole pretend-to-be-shocked-at-being-caught-on-camera, following with, "Oh, I didn't see you there, but look at how my family is enjoying this!"

After I elbowed MrFodder for bursting out laughing during the video, we somehow managed to make it through the rest of it without mocking it. Our consultant grabbed us again once the video was over (not really giving us time to discuss anything), and continued the sales pitch.

She asked what we thought of timeshares, and I replied that I had heard that they were bad. She explained that with a timeshare, how it works is that you are allocated a particular room at a particular venue at a particular time. The benefit is that the price you pay is fixed, but the downside is that you have to take the exact same vacation year after year. With regular vacations, you can go wherever you want, whenever you want, but over time, the price of going on vacations will go up. To combat this, they thought they'd take the best of both worlds and create "vacation sharing" - rather than having a fixed booking, you get points every year which you can spend wherever you want, whenever you want, for a fixed price.

We went on a tour of the facility. She picked up a keycard for a regular one-bedroom apartment, and also a presidential suite apartment, which she gave MrFodder to hold on to. The one-bedroom apartment looked pretty average, like a serviced-apartment you'd find at a 2 / 3 star hotel. When we got to the presidential suite, she allowed MrFodder to swipe the card and let us in. It was so luxurious.

You get a massive dining room table.

There are three double bedrooms, with one of them being a master bedroom which is much larger and has an ensuite.

Here's a view from the balcony - did I mention you get your own private pool and a great view of the beach?

Here is one of the bathrooms, with a bathtub, indoor shower, and outdoor shower. Plus it has its own TV, which you can watch from the bathtub. Both of the bathrooms had a TV.

It was two floors of amazingness, but I knew in the back of my mind that being on the lowest package would probably mean more time in the one-bedroom apartments, and no time in the presidential suite.

We returned to the seminar room, with the consultant careful to grab the keycard from MrFodder as soon as we left the suite. It had now been about an hour, and we finally got to see the numbers. The Texan guy returned and started by saying that there are two packages. Their standard package, which is available anytime, includes 12,000 points per year, however, these points don't roll over (you lose them if you don't use them within the year), and the deal only lasts 39 years. You can get all that for the lovely price of a $16,000 upfront payment, which must be paid in full, plus a yearly ~$1,000 maintenance fee.

Or, you can get the premium package, which is only available at the seminar, for one-day only!!!! With the premium package, you get 6,000 credits per year, you can rollover points for up to three years, borrow points from future years, there was something else called bonus time and fun time which meant that you could spend money, rather than points, if you wanted a bit more. But the best part is that you can pass this "ownership" on to your kids and their kids so the benefits will stay in the family. All of this for a $2,700 upfront payment, with the rest of the $16,000 being a loan financed by them, with easy payment plans available, plus a ~$700 per year maintenance fee. (My brother later added that if you had someone you hated, you should leave them the ownership of this product in your will.)

The best part about being an owner is that you are an owner - all the properties are held in a trust, of which you are now a part of. If the company goes under (which is also incredibly unlikely, because it's huge), you can either keep your share and continue the program with whoever ends up buying out the company, or you can sell it for what you paid and get your money back - so it's no risk! Except I honestly don't think it works like that.

Fortunately, both of them seemed to notice that MrFodder and I balked at the cost of the product, and after we stated that we couldn't afford it, and it really didn't appeal to us, they stayed true to their word and didn't push it. We collected our cruise tickets and returned to Port Denaru.

I thought some of the tactics they used during the sales talk were quite interesting. The Texan guy found out that we played computer games, and he started talking about how he likes to play games. I mentioned an allergy, and she said she had one, too. They were trying to appear similar to us. She also played the sob story angle, with the divorce and dead father, and I did feel bad for her, but MrFodder pointed out that she might not even be telling the truth.

The entire start of the sales pitch wasn't spent selling anything, but rather on trying to make us picture a vacation, and put us in a positive frame of mind when thinking about vacations. Just think, if we didn't have to worry about the pesky cost of accommodation, we could go on holiday every year!

The timeshare thing was a nice touch, as this program definitely has a timeshare feel to it, so by actually addressing the negative aspect of timeshares up front, they manage to disassociate them from their product. It's true that timeshares are different, but it's not like vacation shares are incredibly flexible either. I asked about the availability of certain venues, as you'd think during school holidays or other busy periods, more people tend to go on holiday, and it's not like they have an unlimited supply of rooms. She explained that if you want a specific place at a specific time, it's best to book 13-months in advance. At the 6-months in advance point, you're only about 50% likely to get the place you want, with the probability reducing drastically the closer you get to your vacation date. Not to mention, there are tiers with the points. So busy periods are a red-tier, and the cost of the same venue during a red-tier date compared to a white-tier date is quite different. Not to mention you are forced to stay at their properties, so if they don't have a place in the city you want to go to, you're out of luck.

The whole passing on to your kids and grandkids just sounds horrible to me, saddling them with a yearly fee and possibly the remainder of your loan if you didn't manage to pay it off before you died.

My brother also added that when he went, he passed up the opportunity, but they told him to wait, brought along a more attractive sales consultant, and gave him a "super special offer" - for $2000, he could have a trial ownership, with 20,000 points for one year, and then decide later if he wanted to join for good.

I failed at getting a clear photo, but you can see the various manilla folders with the different tiers of plans available (with different colours being for different currencies).

We were offered what I think was the lowest plan, but I think some of the other folders contain higher levels of plans (before we mentioned money woes, she briefly spoke about a premium plan with 12,000 points per year, but it had a ~$1,000 yearly fee - the more points you get, the higher your fee is).

I also found it interesting that we weren't really given time to discuss it alone. There was the time when we were looking at the presidential suite, where she left us alone to explore, but that was before they had gone over the monetary side of it, so we couldn't really discuss it then. I imagine that if we had asked, they would have let us talk it over, but I can't say for sure.

It also seems to prey on families, as they were really pushing the holidays with kids angle, both in the video, and with the fact that even the one-bedroom apartment would house a family of four, as it had a pull out bed to sleep two extra people.

I mentioned to MrFodder that I thought it was weird that they didn't tell us upfront what it was (when we registered for the seminar), as if we had known, we would have known that it wasn't for us, and it would have saved them the time (and money, as they wouldn't have had to give us a cruise voucher). MrFodder said that was the entire point - they wanted to expand their market, and so if they didn't give you a chance to self-select yourself out, they could get you into the room and start using all the usual sales tactics to try and get you to change your mind. It doesn't even matter if 70% of the people aren't interested, they make so much money from the other 30% that they can afford to eat the loss - which just goes to show what a bad deal it is. Plus, if they told us beforehand, we'd be able to research what it was, and come across all the negative posts saying what a bad deal it is, and how a lot of people who get suckered into them end up trying to sell it to someone else, or sell their credits to other owners to recoup some of the cost. Fortunately, I'd already read about that on /r/askReddit, so once I found out what it was, that was all I could think about.

It was an interesting experience, to have a seasoned salesperson try to sell to us, and despite MrFodder's fears that I'd cave, I honestly didn't feel compelled at any point, and I'm glad they didn't try to pressure us.

Vanilla and Chocolate

On our way back to Nadi from Port Denaru, we took the bus to Nadi Market (Central Nadi?). MrFodder were trying to get back to our hotel, and didn't realise that Nadi Market wasn't the same suburb as Namaka, where our hotel was. Hey, we had literally landed in Fiji that morning, cut us some slack!

We left the bus depot, and thinking our hotel wasn't far, began walking. Not long after leaving, a Fijian-looking man greeted us.

Fijian: Bula!
Us: Bula!
Fijian: Where are you from?
Us: Australia.
Fijian: Aussie! Aussie Aussie!
Me: Oi! Oi! Oi!
Fijian: How are you finding Fiji?
MrFodder: It's our first day here. It's nice.
Me: How did you know we're not from Fiji?
Fijian: (gives me an "Are you stupid?" look) Because I'm chocolate, and you're vanilla. Hey, before you go, leave the vanilla behind and take the chocolate.
Us: (laughter)

He said that last line while looking at MrFodder. I was shocked, as I thought he was asking MrFodder to leave me behind and take him home instead.

Fijian: If you're going to catch the bus, only catch it from the depot. I'm a local, so I know where the real things are. There are so many Indian shops here, but you want to shop from a real Fijian market. Let me show you.

We follow him across the road, and even though there are cars coming, he says, "It's OK. Fiji Time!" and the cars seem to stop for him.

Fijian: I'm from a village 2 hours drive from here. I drive in and out everyday.
Me: Wow, that's impressive!
Fijian: If you shop at the Indian markets, they just take the money and put it in their pocket. If you shop at the Fijian markets, we take the money back to our own village. So are you here for a holiday, or is this your honeymoon?
Us: Just a holiday.
Fijian: Ah, practice makes perfect, right?

Note: As we were going to spend a lot of time on the beach, and our wedding rings are still a little loose on us, neither of us wore them on this trip. He took us to the market, and seemed to be pressuring us to go inside, but we said that we weren't interested in buying anything at the moment, and left.

We continued walking towards our hotel when another Fijian approaches us.

F2: Bula!
Us: Bula!
F2: Ah, so where are you guys from?
Us: Australia.
F2: Aussie! Aussie! Aussie!
Us: Oi! Oi! Oi!
F2: So how are you enjoying Fiji?
MrFodder: It's our first day here. It's nice so far.
F2: That's good. So... just do me a favour while you're here - (points to his arm) leave the vanilla and take some chocolate home!
Us: (hesitant laughter)

I realise at this point that he's talking about getting a tan. Also, this entire encounter has a feeling of déjà vu.

F2: There are a lot of Indian craft shops around here. But I'm a local, I know where the local shops are. There's a Fijian crafts shop near here, let me show you. It has things made from my village 2 hours from here. Don't buy things from those Indian shops.

We reluctantly follow him to the shop to be polite. Once we're inside, one of his friends pulls us aside and says he'll perform a traditional Fijian welcoming ceremony with us, free of charge! We take our shoes off and sit on the mat. He begins by putting some powdered kava into a cloth sack and soaks it in a water. He shows us a map and points out the location of his village, and also shows us a laminated yellowed newspaper article talking about the virtues of kava.

Ceremony Man: (to MrFodder) Today you can be the chief. I bet she's the chief at home, so you can be the chief for once.

We go through the ceremony, with both of us passing up their offer of the muddy-looking kava water. They try to persuade us to buy some items in their shop, but we decline and leave.

By now, we realise we are nowhere near the place where our hotel is, and I look it up on Google maps and we are 1.5 hours walk away! Another Fijian comes up to us.

F3: Bula!
Us: Bula!
Me: (pointing to Google maps) Do you know how we can get to the Ratsun Hotel?
F3: Sure. I'll show you on the map in my shop.

We follow him across the road (more Fiji Time Frogger antics).

F3: So where are you from?
Us: Australia.
F3: Aussie! Aussie! Aussie!
Us: (dejectedly) Oi! Oi! Oi!
F3: Do me a favour before you leave Fiji, OK? Leave the vanilla behind and take some chocolate!
Us: (barely a chuckle)
F3: This is a traditional Fijian crafts shop. The only one in Nadi. Don't buy from the Indian shops, they're not as good as not the real thing. While you're here, we'll show you a traditional Fijian welcoming ceremony.
Us: Oh, we already did this at another store.
F3: It's OK. You can do it here, too! (To MrFodder) Today you can be the chief. I bet she's the chief at home, so while you're on holiday, you should be the chief.

He says the same thing about his village 2 hours away. We go through the same welcoming ceremony. We see the same laminated yellowed newspaper article and the same map. SIGH.

We leave that shop without buying anything, I message my sister who tells us that the way home is a yellow bus at the depot we were at. We decide we'll just catch a taxi, but the taxis we find are completely unattended. We see the bus we want driving past us and make a run for it, but miss it. I decided to summon my inner Fijian (after all, I've been doubly welcomed now) and wave at the bus. It slows down, blocking the traffic in the area, and allows us to board. I've finally stopped traffic!

In all honesty, the entire experience has really dulled my impression of Fiji. I absolutely hate it when people try to pressure me into buying their things. Your product should sell based on its own merits, not on slimy sales tactics.

Fun In Jungle Island

When you leave the Nadi Airport in Fiji, you're greeted by the smell of something burning. I felt panic at first, but then I realised the smell was smokey, but had a pleasant sweet undertone to it, and figured it was probably the smell of burning sugar cane. I'd heard that Fiji featured endless rows of sugar cane plants, but nobody mentioned the constant fires. We were on our way home in a taxi one night, and the side of the road was lit up in flames, with a few large bushes burning fiercely. None of the locals seemed remotely bothered by that at all, and everyone just drove past as though this was nothing out of the ordinary. Our driver didn't even seem to notice it, which was odd, as he was in the habit of pointing out various features of the landscape to us.

Fiji was... not what I imagined. I had pictured long stretches of beach, dotted with resorts, but that is not Nadi at all. (Nadi, the city where the airport is, is pronounced "Nandi" - it seems 'D' has an 'ND' sound - so Natadola Beach (where the above photo was taken) is pronounced "Natandola Beach").

The people here are friendly, which seems to be something Fiji is famous for. I guess that's one side-effect of having tourism play a large part in your country's economy. Aside from tourism, one of the main exports of Fiji is, unsurprisingly, sugar.

It is some really nice sugar, and looks like what we call raw sugar in Australia (light brown in colour with large crystals).

Here are some things I've learned about travelling in Fiji (accurate as of 28th of July, 2017):

• "Bula" means "life" and is used as a greeting in Fiji. It's not uncommon for people walking by to say "Bula" to you, and you are supposed to reply "Bula" in return. We were told that saying it is symbolic of giving life to someone else, and it's a friendly thing. It's interesting going to a country where we obviously look like tourists, as it seems people all over the place would say "Bula" to us when walking by, but it seems  the locals only say it to each other when they already know each other.
• "Fiji Time". Fijians are quite laidback, and a result of this seems to be that they'll do things at their own pace - after all, you don't need to stress, everything gets done eventually. This can be quite frustrating as a foreigner, as you might need to make a flight or be somewhere at a specific time. My sister ordered a taxi to pick them up from somewhere, and the guy arrived an hour and a half later than he said he would - with constant updates from him saying he was "only 15 minutes away". This doesn't apply to everyone in the country, and we met plenty of people who were early / on-time, but often when things don't go as planned, everyone seems to just shrug their shoulders and say, "Fiji Time!".
• withdrawing money from an ATM can get expensive. We saw some ANZ and Westpac ATMs, and withdrawing cash from an ANZ ATM cost us $15 FJD per transaction (we have a Citibank card) - my sister says Westpac ATMs are the same. Towards the end of our trip, MrFodder found out that Bred ATMs only charge $10 FJD for withdrawls.
  
• cash is king - there are a lot of places that don't accept credit cards - including the medical centre and the hospital!
• "Bula Belly" (my variant of "Dehli Belly") - we've been told not to drink tap water in Fiji, and I did spend quite a lot of time during the trip with an unsettled feeling in my stomach. None of us got gastro or anything like that, fortunately, but it's a good idea to be wary of water at restaurants, and fresh fruit or vegetables that may have been rinsed with tap water. We carried bottled water everywhere, and also brushed our teeth with bottled water. Is this something to make tourists buy more bottled water? Maybe. But when you're on holiday, I think it's better to be safe than sorry.
• there are taxis and there are "taxis". We saw quite a few people driving actual taxis, with the taxi sign on top of their car, and a meter inside. But there are also quite a lot of people who will drive you somewhere for a flat fee. It was quite scary at first, and there were a few trips where I was sure they were going to drive us to a sugar cane field, kill us and steal our stuff, but I'm still alive, so it didn't happen to us at least! If you do get a "taxi", make sure you clarify the amount upfront, and a lot of them will often upcharge, so if haggling is your thing, go for it.
• wi-fi: not very common in Nadi at least. We ended up getting a free Vodaphone SIM card at the airport, which you can use to get 800MB for $5.99, 1GB for $6.99, or 1.5GB of data for $7.99 FJD, which expires after a week.
• Language: Everyone we met seems to speak fluent English, or a passable amount of English
• Haggling - other than taxis, it seems everything is open for haggling, if you are so inclined. I think of it as the "tourist tax".

It's Your Birthday

A birthday gift for A.

I can finally talk about this, I've been keeping it a secret for three months now. He has been feeling a bit blue lately, so I wanted to do something to cheer him up. It started out small, with a few of his former co-workers, and suddenly blew up to something quite large. It was originally going to be a 5-minute video, but turned into a 23-minute one, and I had to leave quite a lot on the virtual cutting room floor.

I asked the same questions to everyone, and in case other people want to do something similar here are the questions that I used:

If A were an ice-cream flavour, what would he be?
I don't know why I picked this one, but I thought it would be interesting to see what kind of replies that I would get.

What do you think his best subject was in high school?
I admit, I picked this one because A and I have an on-going joke that we do things to try and prove people are racist. Sure enough, quite a few responses thought he'd be good at maths.

If he were stuck on a deserted island, what three things would he have with him?
I just stole this from /r/askReddit. Some of the responses were funny, but overall, a bit lacklustre.

If he were a supervillain, what superpower would he have?
This question was quite bad, and I considered leaving it out completely. There were a few funny responses, but most people skipped the question.

If you could get A to try something new, what would it be?
I asked this because I genuinely wanted to know what kind of responses I'd get, and it'd be something nice for him to hear. Hopefully he'll take up some of the suggestions. The funniest answer was pop 'n' lock dancing.

If he were put on a spaceship and sent to help colonise a new planet, what would be his contributing role?
This one I picked because I thought it was a creative way to try and tease out what people think his good traits are.

What do you think A's go-to pick-up line is?
This one was just there for comedy value, to try and break up some of the heavy emotion.

What is something you think he does well?
Another one to help him see that other people value him.

What advice would you give him?
This one I thought would be a good question to end the video on, as it would be something to help him move forward.

The tone of the video was a nice mix of humour and emotion, with some people opting to give joke answers, and some people giving sincere answers. When it came to the last question, all of the answers were sincere.

It was actually quite enjoyable to work on, and see how amazing some of the people in his life are. This required a lot less editting time than my other videos, as there were no special effects, and it was just a matter of pacing the answers, and putting in some video transitions.

I really hope he'll like his present, and I hope he realises how much he means to the people around him.

Not Sorry

I can't remember who spoke about this, but I've been trying this new thing where I don't say "Sorry" unless it's something I'm genuinely sorry about. There are other ways of expressing sorry without using the S-word, and I know it's an almost pedantic thing, but I'm finding that it is having an amazing impact on my life.

For instance, if someone were to invite me to do something and I wasn't available, I would previously say, "Sorry, I can't make it, I have ______". Which sounds innocent enough, except I would then feel compelled to make it up to them, as though my unavailability had inconvenienced them, and I needed to do something in return. But the truth is, I probably didn't inconvenience them. They probably just went and asked someone else, and thought nothing of me after my refusal.

It's amazing how liberating it is. I don't feel bad about turning things down, I don't feel anxious when trying to explain that I don't want to do something. I might not even have plans that day, I just don't feel like doing whatever it is I've been invited to, or I'll be tired from doing something else that weekend, or just want to chill at home and play games. As long as I'm not neglecting my friendships, I think that's OK.

And I feel like a giant weight has been lifted off my back.

No Good Deed

We have a challenge at work where if you catch someone who has left their computer unlocked, you get to change their background picture to an almost inappropriate looking photo of a certain actor. We have a running tally of who has managed to catch whom. The point is to encourage people to be more security aware, and lock their computers when they aren't there.

I did it to one of my co-workers, who hadn't previously been caught before, and it took him a long time to realise (because he had so many windows open). It seems he hadn't heard about this challenge before, so he was quite shocked when he saw the photo and began to panic, thinking that there was something wrong with his computer.

Fortunately, one of our other teammates noticed, and explained the challenge to him.

Unfortunately, he left his computer unlocked again that same day, and Jal took the opportunity to get him again.and score a point.

It seems he felt quite embarrassed about being caught twice in the same day, and I felt bad, as he has always been so nice to me, so I said that I'd make him some waffles over the weekend to make up for it.

I left this on his desk in the morning, and he said to me, "Well, now I'm glad that I left my computer unlocked."

He left his computer unlocked again that day.

Gah!

Vegan Coffee Ice Cream

Another one for the monthly ice-cream challenge! MrBrioche thinks that it doesn't matter what kind of coffee you use for ice-cream, whether good beans or instant. I begged to differ, so I had planned to do a blind taste test in the office, but didn't have time to make my instant coffee ice-cream, so it'll have to wait until I'm back from Fiji.

I was a bit worried that the extra coffee would add too much water, and I didn't want to use coconut anything because I didn't want there to be a coconut flavour in the ice-cream, so I was unsure how it would turn out.

Ingredients
800g soy milk (yes, grams, I couldn't be bothered getting a measuring cup out)
50g stevia
175g raw sugar
1 cup coffee made from an aeropress
2 tsp vanilla extract

Method
Heat all the ingredients together. Cool in fridge for at least 4 hours, preferably overnight. Prepare in ice-cream machine.

I was surprised how simple it was, and even after a day, the ice-cream was really soft! There were a few icy bits, and the coffee flavour wasn't as strong as I'd have liked - it was more like an iced coffee flavour, rather than actual coffee, very sweet. I might try again with dextrose and see how I go.

MrFodder really liked it, so that's a good sign. I also want to experiment with adding a bit of chocolate for a mocha flavoured ice-cream.

Battle Cup Weekend - Game 3

We made it to the Grand Final!

Match ID 3314960903 (DotaBuff / OpenDota)

They actually banned Clockwerk and CM first, which is pretty funny, but I guess those two heroes really worked for us, so it made sense. They then went on to ban Ursa, Morphling and Necrolyte. Which means my beloved Shadow Fiend made it through, but I guess Viper was a better pick-up, so I ended up playing him again.

They had a weird line-up, with Enchantress in middle lane, but it worked, as I really struggled against her, being ganked by Spirit Breaker and Rubick so much that I had to have redbeanpork and MrMoustache babysit me again.

Radiant
MrMoustache - Witch Doctor
redbeanpork - Warlock
Pharmacist - Wraith King
Me - Viper
Ridehunter - Earthshaker

Dire
Spirit Breaker
Enchantress
Axe
Visage
Rubick

It actually looked like they were going a strong pushing line-up, which is why we picked Earthshaker. It ended up being a bit of a mixed bag, as it allowed Rubick to steal Fissure, and with Rubick's faster cast point, meant he'd usually get it off first.

The game was quite touch-and-go, with us being quite far behind until the 25 minute mark, where we managed to turn it around. But then we lost our lead in 10 minutes, and it was pretty back and forth until we finally managed to break their base.

Earthshaker gave away first blood, and then died 2 more times in the early game. I got ganked a couple of times, as well, and it was a really rough start for our team. Things finally started turning around for me once I got Shadow Blade, which I turned into Silver Edge, as it meant we could get rid of Enchantress' Untouchable passive and she started dropping a bit more. Earthshaker also ended up picking up a Silver Edge, probably for the same reason.

Warlock's Aghs also came online at around the 42 minute mark, and it was much smoother sailing from there.

It was a really close game, and we lost all of our tier 2 towers. I actually had quite a bad death in bottom lane, that should have cost us the game, but fortunately, the other team didn't push their advantage, and we managed to stay in it. Teaches me not to be so cocky!

And that's the end of that Battle Cup weekend!

Battle Cup Weekend - Game 2

Game 2! Match ID: 3314828470 - Dotabuff / OpenDota

We banned Jugg and Sven.

They banned Kunkka and Anti-Mage. Not sure if they banned Kunkka because of MrMoustache, but he said he could play CM, so we decided to put him on CM and redbeanpork would take another hero.

We picked up CM and Clockwerk for MrMoustache and Ridehunter.

Their next two bans were Invoker and Shadow Fiend.

Uh-oh. Disaster. I guess it shouldn't have come as a surprise. Even though Shadow Fiend is nowhere near my most played hero, I've probably played him the most - 7 out of my last 15 matches. However, this marks my first respect ban! I said to Pharmacist that I'm kinda like AdmiralBulldog only worse, as he had two heroes he played reliably (Lone Druid and Nature's Prophet). I only have one!

The original plan was for Ridehunter to take mid if Shadow Fiend was taken, but we had already picked Clockwerk for him! I can't play Clockwerk. But the only effective mid hero I can play is Shadow Fiend - with the others being Skywrath Mage and Silencer. Skywrath tends to fall off and can't kill towers, and Silencer just needs too much before he becomes effective.

We picked up the Warlock, but spent a lot of time trying to decide on our mid hero. I think the other team must been quite happy with the Shadow Fiend ban. redbeanpork offered to play Viper in mid, but I figured he'd be a better Warlock than me, so we opted to give him Warlock and I'd take Viper. Our team was rounded out with Necro, after Pharmacist meant to pick Wraith King, but accidentally banned him instead! Not a great start to our second game.

Radiant
Witch Doctor
Centaur Warrunner
Disruptor
Spectre
Obsidian Destroyer

Dire
MrMoustache: CM
Ridehunter: Clockwerk
redbeanpork: Warlock
me: Viper
Pharmacist: Necrophos

We knew that with this line-up against theirs, we had to end the game quickly, well before Spectre would have a chance to come online. They had a decent team fight team, with Witch Doctor and Disruptor working well to keep us zoned, and Centaur to jump in and tank hits.

Mid actually went really well for me. Unlike last week's Battle Cup, where I was Shadow Fiend and really struggled against OD, this time I was Viper, whose Corrosive Skin ability makes it hard for OD to constantly spam his Astral Imprison on me (since doing so will make him take damage, too). I think OD might have been their weakest player, because I managed to solo kill him a couple of times, even though he could have saved himself with Astral while a teammate teleported in. I couldn't believe it, but I ended up going 9-0 at the start of the game, before dying to Witch Doctor.

I really messed up this game, and I think we nearly lost because I decided to go MKB before BKB. Once I picked up BKB, things went a lot easier for me. I went MKB first because I wanted the damage and to pre-emptively counter Spectre's Radiance, but if I had picked up BKB first, I probably wouldn't have died as much, and been able to have both a lot quicker than by going MKB first. I think I'm still in the support "I can't afford BKB" mindset, but I am getting better at it - usually picking it up as my third or fourth item, depending on how the game is going.

I can't remember if it was MrMoustache or Ridehunter who commented that I was building Viper exactly the same way I built SF. Not going to argue against that point! I played Viper the same way, and even got frustrated at how slowly he clears waves of creeps. I focused far too much on denying, even though he doesn't pick up souls like SF, and there was a team fight when I had just died, and I was about to say that I wasn't ready to fight as I had to farm up souls before I remembered that Viper doesn't need them. Viper is a lot tankier off the bat than SF, which helped me a lot. And the extra damage from Nethertoxin really helped me get last hits in the early game.

You probably can't tell from the graph, but I felt like there were a few moments in the game where it was a bit iffy that we could pull this off. Pharmacist got some good ults off, making it easier for us to break the base as we had longer before they respawned.

Fortunately, we were able to end the game in 43:31, and Spectre only had Radiance and Yasha at that point. Our CM had a higher networth than their entire team, with redbeanpork not far behind (10.8k compared to their highest on 11.1k).

With this victory, we headed towards the grand final of that week's Battle Cup!

Battle Cup Weekend - Game 1

Our second attempt at the Battle Cup for TI7!

We had entered the week before, and lost in the semi-finals. Our first game the week before was a completely stomp, but we were completely out-matched in our second game.

This week, we thought we'd try to stall our first game, the logic being that if we finished our match early, it would mean we had clearly outplayed our opponents. We'd then get matched with another team who had also clearly outplayed their opponents. If we managed to stall the game out, we'd be matched against another team who struggled to beat their first opponent. Seems somewhat seedy and underhanded, but it was probably our only way to win.

 So this week, we formed a team. Hag wasn't available, so the team was: me, Pharmacist, redbeanpork, their friend Mr Moustache, and his friend Ridehunter. redbeanpork made a logo for our team which featured The Hound from Game of Thrones, and a plate of chicken (possibly Gami Chicken, as MrFodder and I had it for dinner without inviting redbeanpork). Our team was called "I'M GOING TO EAT EVERY CHICKEN".

Pharmacist plays safe-lane carry, redbeanpork, MrMoustache and I all play support, and Ridehunter can play any role. Since I have received training for mid, the deal was that I would play mid if we could get Shadow Fiend, otherwise Ridehunter would take mid and I'd take the offlane role.

The first game (Match ID: 3314724235 / OpenDota) was a bit of a stomp. Final score: 42-26.

Radiant
MrMoustache: Kunkka
redbeanpork: Crystal Maiden
Pharmacist: Morphling
Me: Shadow Fiend
Ridehunter: Clockwerk

Dire
Warlock
Clinkz
Monkey King
Abaddon
Spirit Breaker

It was a disaster at the start, I gave away first blood. And got ganked again not long afterwards. But I had redbeanpork and MrMoustache come and help me out, and caught up at around the 10 minute mark. Pharmacist farmed well, and their towers started dropping. Soon, we had pretty good map control. Ridehunter got off a lot of good hooks and once we started picking off Warlock quite reliably before he could drop his ult, it helped a lot. I did hit Abaddon while his ult was up a few times, but got a bit better at it towards the end of the game.

I really struggled against Monkey King at the start, but after picking up Silver Edge, it helped a lot! Clinkz did like to hang around our back line and pick off the supports, but redbeanpork and MrMoustache did a good job of keeping vision and true vision up.

It was a great early win for our team, and our plan to string the game out failed, as we finished our match in 34:17.

Oh well, a positive start to the cup!

The Little Things - American Doughnuts

One of the great things to do in Melbourne is visit the American Doughnut Kitchen van at the Queen Victoria Market. Despite the fact that it's housed in a van, I don't think they ever go anywhere, as they've always been there, as far as I can tell, and even after operating hours, the van itself is still there.

I remember when I first saw the van, I hated strawberry jam. I was an incredibly picky eater, and would only eat plain things. Believe it or not, but I didn't even like tomato sauce back then! So I would ask for plain doughnuts. I don't know if they still do them, but I'm all for jam doughnuts now. Mmmm, even thinking about the warm doughnuts with gooey jam inside is making me drool.

They're currently 5 for $6, and they have a sign saying that unfortunately they had to raise their prices recently, even though they've held off for a long time. These doughnuts aren't perfectly round like ones you can find at other stores, but I think that's part of the charm.

It's a bit hard to see from my photos, but they start with a giant ball of dough, that was probably made the night before and left in the fridge. It's kneaded a bit, then cut into smaller pieces. They move a wooden board with the pieces over to the other side where someone spreads them out on a wire rack which is lowered into the oil.

Once it's done (roughly 2 minutes and 45 seconds), it's pulled out and dropped into the window by the corner.

If jam is required, someone puts it on the jam machine, which has a small pipe that you can slot a doughnut into. The handle is cranked down, and jam is inserted. I didn't notice this, but A did: there's an adjustable notch that helps control how much jam goes into the doughnut. The guy jamming the doughnuts was really quick.

Behind him, there's a bowl with sugar in it where the doughnuts are coated. Then they're put into paper bags and sold.

A pointed out that it's actually quite clever that they sell them in packs of 5 - so they can come pre-bagged which speeds up the process of selling them. If someone only wants one, the jam guy can just coat one with sugar and hand it to the person at the window.

It actually looks like a pretty streamlined process. A and I were trying to work out when someone could take a break to go to the toilet, and what would happen to the line. It's possible one of the two people who are doing the kneading would move over to replace someone else in the line.

Then we were trying to think who had the easiest and who had the hardest job. The hardest was probably the person who had to spread the balls of dough onto the wire rack and drop them onto the fryer. The easiest was probably the person taking the money, as it's probably the least RSI prone position of them all.

A did raise a concern about the doughnuts in the window, as they just keep dropping new ones on top. Depending on how quickly they get jammed, and how quickly new ones come in, there might be some that sit at the bottom and never get picked up. I noticed that every now and again, he tends to shift them around with his hand, so there is some rotation, but that doesn't guarantee that the old ones are next in line to be jammed before the fresh ones are picked up.

-----------

As delicious as these are, I feel like they aren't as good as they used to be. Not enough jam! :(

Still, it's something to experience if you are ever in Melbourne. :)

Sunshine and Relaxation

I'm kinda going to cheat on my 365 day photo challenge, and upload some pictures that are going to be a bit older than my 7-day rule. Mostly because.... we are going to Fiji for a week! It's uncertain whether we will have internet access while we are gone, so I'm going to pre-write a week's worth of posts now.

I had originally planned to do a write-up of a survey I had done earlier on gaming partner preferences, but I still haven't gotten around to running the stats as I've been doing a lot of other things, and using my downtime to get some gaming in. Instead, I'll just write about whatever I can think of to fill the week that I'll be gone. Hopefully you won't miss me all that much!

Really looking forward to having some time to relax and catch up on some reading. I've got quite a few books that were recommended to me to get through, and it'll be nice to wake up to some warmer weather for once.

The Little Things - Twistto

After the Bastille Day Festival, A and I made the short walk to the Queen Victoria Market. I don't know if this is just something that people who work in technology do (as MrFodder does it, too), but one of the things we did as we were walking around was looking at how all the various stalls operate.

If you haven't heard of it, Twistto are these Korean twisted, fried, battered potatoes on a giant skewer, which they often coat in a flavoured salt. They're incredibly delicious, although it can get quite difficult to eat in the middle. It's $7 for one potato skewer. I think they seem to have a permanent store at the Queen Vic Market, and they tend to pop up at various festivals, too, especially Asian themed ones.

So there's one guy who puts a peeled potato into a machine and turns a handle which creates that twisted shape. Then a woman picks up the cut potato and spreads it out on a skewer. A man grabs that and coats it in a batter in one pan, and allows the excess to drip off into another pan. Then he drops it into a vat of frying oil, where a guy allows it to fry for a bit, then puts it into a different vat, before removing it. A woman coats it in whatever salt is required and hands it out.

First of all, the guy doing the potato cutting has to reach across the potato spreading woman to reach the peeled potatoes, then she reaches across him to grab the cut potatoes. They could just swap the position of both boxes so neither has to reach across the other.

The same thing with the man doing the batter - he pulls it out and batters it in the box to his right, then allows it to drip in the box on his left, then raises it over the box on his right and puts it into the vat. It would be more efficient to swap those two boxes, too!

It's not a huge difference, but sometimes it's about the little things you can change - a few minutes saved every day can add up.

Stay tuned for the day after tomorrow's post... about doughnuts!

Bastille Day French Festival

A and I went to check out the Bastille Day French Festival, which was held at the North Melbourne Meat Market. We got there at 11am, and the line wasn't too bad. It's a gold coin donation to enter, and inside, there are various stalls selling French clothing, jewellery, books, and some other things that I don't remember. I just went for the food. They had a crêpe stall, as usual, but I think I'm finding that I prefer the ones that I make myself....

Of course, there were a few bakeries that sold bread and pastries. We had to try some. I bought a couple of things for MrFodder.

From the top left: pain au chocolat and crème brûlée, from Choukette Fine Pastries in Brunswick, and.... *drumroll* KOUIGN AMANN!!! (From Gontran Cherrier in Collingwood.)

20th of June is kouign amann day in the US, and I had planned to try my hand at making it, but was busy with something else that day. I first heard of this bread from an episode of Yakitate Japan!!!, where Mokoyama, the sweet bread specialist, makes a Kouign Pudding Amann with the highest quality ingredients. I was drooling even though I had never tried one in real life. So when I saw that they had them, I couldn't pass up the chance. Being the pleb that I am, I asked them how to pronounce it, and it sounds like "Queen Amahn" (or "Amon", depending on which part of France you are from) - though I'm guessing it's meant to be more like "Coo-in". It was amazingly sweet, and I think I'm in love. The bottom was glazed in a honey glaze.

The funny thing about eating with A is that people always tend to mess up his name when he orders, so we were curious to see what he'd get this time. It was a new one for him (which I won't write here, since it'll give away his name and defeat the purpose of me calling him "A").

A and I walked around a bit, and noticed that someone missed leg day.

He seemed to be following us around. A asked me how it felt to be stalked. I said it felt great! (It was actually a bit scary after a while.)

Unfortunately, there wasn't much else to do there, so we left. As we were walking out, there was a huuuuuuuuuuuge line outside the door. So glad we went when we did.

A Little Night Music

As part of a Mozart Festival (14th - 23rd July), the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra is doing a series of performances featuring various songs throughout his career.

It's actually quite nice, the way that they did it, breaking the performance into 3 parts, with each part starting with someone reading out some excerpts from letters from, to, or about Wolfgang Mozart, or from his sister's memoirs. The parts they picked were fascinating, and it was a nice contrast to the movie I saw at the French Film Festival, which was from the point of view of Nannerl (his sister).

The songs that were performed:

Allergo in C, K1b
Andante in C, K1a
Allergo in F, K1c
Minuet in F, K1d
Minuet in C, K1f
Minuet in G, K1e

Symphony No.1 in E flat, K16

Exsultate, jubilate  - Motet, K165
Adagio in E, K261

Eine kleine Nachtmusik, Serenade No. 13 in G, K525
Symphony No. 31 in D, K297 'Paris'

Ever since QC admonished people for clapping at the wrong time during the Sidney Myer free concerts, I've always been really self-conscious about clapping at classical music performances (you're not supposed to clap after each song, but rather after each set. If you are too noob to recognise when a set is over, like me, it's safest just to clap once other people have started clapping). But I don't think anybody clapped at the wrong time at this one - maybe there was a plant in the audience to "seed the clapping" so that everyone else knew when to clap, I'm not sure.

My guilty admission is that I enjoy watching the conductor more than listening to the music. I like to imagine he's performing a mime, and making up my own story as I go.

This conductor looked like he worked at McDonald's. At the start, he was pushing burgers onto the slidey-rack thing for the front staff to bag up and give to customers. Then, he started preparing more burgers, chucking patties onto the grill, flipping them over, and then gently placing the buns on top, sprinkling them with sesame seeds (I know that the buns at McDonald's are pre-seeded, but that's what it looked like he was doing).

Halfway through, he was looked like he was in the breakroom, putting little chocolates in his mouth, but taking a bit and rejecting them - tossing the poor chocolates onto the floor. This put him in a bad mood, so once his break was over, he began stamping his foot, ranting at his co-workers that this place sucks! But it was time for the lunch rush, and so it was back to angrily throwing patties onto the grill, but much faster this time, and with more gusto! He starts gesturing to the other workers. You on the left, this is how it's done: patty, cheese, lettuce, bun, wrap it up to go. Now you on the right, get those chips in the fryer. Down. Down. Down.

Flip those burgers. Gently place the buns on top. Quick, put them on the slidey rack thing.

You can see what a cultured person I am.... In all seriousness, the amazing music made a nice backdrop for my private movie, and I really enjoyed watching the performance.

Biting Off More Than I Can Chew

Day 1 of the $15 challenge 

Breakfast wasn't too bad. I had plain oats: no milk (couldn't afford it), and no water in the end, because I didn't want to dilute the flavour of the oats as I figured I'd have enough blandness for the week to come. I think it actually worked out kinda well, and this is going to sound a bit gross, but keeping the oats in my mouth a bit longer allowed saliva to break it down a bit more, and it started to get a bit of a sweet taste. Plus, it took me longer to eat it this way, so there was less time between meals, which I figured would be a good thing. I was disappointed, as breakfast is the meal I look forward to the most.

Lunch was miserable. I had stayed up pretty late the night before, so I wanted to go home early. I ended up working through lunch so that I could leave a bit earlier, but that meant eating at my desk. I didn't even end up finishing my lunch in the end. It was like my stomach closed up shop and said, "Nope, I'll have no more of that, thank you very much." The damper was quite nice though.

Dinner fared much better, as I played while working on some other things, reading reddit, and chatting with the Dota crew.

I made it through the day! Stomach didn't grumble. 6 more to go.

Day 2

I had a barre class after work, so I put some extra oats in for my breakfast to try and help tide myself over for a late dinner. I had learned my lesson from day 1, and thought I'd chill with Special K for lunch, as it would help take my mind off eating beans, but I had forgotten that she was away on training. Fortunately, Michael didn't have plans, and it really did make eating bland food that much easier, as lunch flew by, and before I knew it, my container was empty. Something that I will have to write about later, but my last experiment seemed to show that good company seems to be what most people think enhances the dining experience the most.

I made it through barre class, but it was a struggle - as it usually is. My stomach was grumbling as I made my way home, but it was OK, as I was about to eat dinner. Again, dinner went by as I was focused on something else.

Day 3

We are getting to more TMI about my digestive habits, but I am actually quite regular, in the sense that I can pretty much narrow down when Number 2 will come calling down to a one-hour window, and it happens every day. By the end of day 3 of the challenge, I was becoming quite concerned as I hadn't even gone once. Special K was still on training, so I had my sad lunch at the desk again, but I distracted myself by going for a run around the CBD trying to find pictures of the BolArt around the place.

I had to finish cooking the rest of the stuff I hadn't cooked on Sunday, and hit my first snag: the dough I had made for the damper and left in the fridge had some black specks in it. Were they there before? Was it normal? Was it mould? It smelled OK, and didn't look to be growing or anything. I didn't have any chickpeas left to make aquafaba, and not enough flour to make another lot of dough, so it was this or nothing. I decided to go with it, and if I felt sick the next day, use the rest of the flour a bit earlier than I had expected, make filo pastry (flour, oil, water, I'd skip the salt), and just eat that by itself.

Day 4

I was still feeling sore from barre class. Normally I'll feel a bit sore the day after, but be mostly recovered by the next day. Today, I was just as sore as I had been yesterday, though Brianna worked us really hard, so it's hard to say whether it was because of the diet, or because I was genuinely sore. I was supposed to do another class tonight, but I ended up cancelling.

Special K was away sick, so I ended up eating alone again. I've started to feel a bit blocked up. Mr Number 2 finally visited, but it was a lot smaller than I expected - maybe less of my food is "waste", so there's less to get rid of? But my stomach started to feel uncomfortable, but not due to hunger, as I didn't feel hungry. It's hard to describe.

This day was tough, because it was the free fries day, but my willpower held strong, and I stayed with my $15 food.

I think the damper was OK. I did feel a bit strange, but not sick or anything, so it could have been psychological. Besides, only 3 more days to go - I can do it!

Day 5

Last day of doing this at work. At least during the weekend, I can fill up on oats if I feel like a snack.

Met up with Pharmacist for lunch, except it wasn't really for lunch, as I sat there and watched him eat food like the creeper that I am (he didn't ask me to leave, so I'll take that as implied consent). I ate my beans and veggies at my desk beforehand, so I wouldn't be tossing up whether to stab him in the stomach for his spaghetti or not - it was Lygon St, after all, wouldn't be completely out of place.

Around mid-afternoon, I started to feel it. Lightheaded-ness, and a weird pain around my heart. I went to get another glass of water, but it didn't really help. As sad as it made me feel, I made the ultimate decision to call it quits. I know everyone thinks I'm crazy for doing things like this, but I do know when to be reasonable, and I think this situation called for it.

I ended up going to Grill'd for dinner and eating a beef burger and sweet potato chips with MrFodder. It was a later dinner than I normally had, and I was so hungry that I completely forgot to take a photo of it for today's post until it was nearly gone.

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I'm still not entirely sure what brought it on. I checked out the stats for the things I had: I covered the important stuff: carbs, protein, maybe not as much fat as I should have, but I didn't think it would have an effect in a week. There was no sugar, but there are heaps of people who cut out sugar from their diets, and they seemed fine. Black beans are actually a great source of iron, and I had the capsicums for vitamin C. MrFodder said sodium, and I will admit that there was barely any sodium, which might be why. He also said that it might just be my body finally reacting to the shock of the sudden change in diet. The first few days, it might have reacted by draining the reserves I had stocked, so it put up with it, but by day 4, it was starting to struggle.

I probably also should have gone into low-energy mode, and not done things like barre, or running around as much as I did.

Throughout the challenge, the only time I really felt hungry was before dinner - which I think is actually a good thing, as eating when you're hungry, as opposed to eating when the time of day is X, is probably a better way to approach eating. One positive is that I've come to appreciate the tastes a bit more, and with the second batch of food, I was a bit more careful about browning the onions for maximum flavour. Something that doesn't matter so much when you can add meat, which has that dominant "meat"flavour that can mask the flavour of the other things.

I've gone back to eating regular food... or at least I'm trying. Even after eating the burger last night, I felt incredibly bloated, and almost felt like throwing up. Cycling from extremes of eating isn't really a good idea! Hopefully I'll be good as new before we leave for Fiji.

This sounds cliché, but the world actually felt really grey and bland the past week. I think if anything, I've come to realise that I really enjoy eating food, and it plays a big part in my life and my happiness. If I really did have to eat like this, I would probably give up other things first - like my phone, entertainment, etc., just so that I could buy things like spices to make it taste better. I guess that was the slightly unrealistic part in this - if we were to both suddenly go broke, we'd still have all the things that we have in our pantry now, including flour, sugar, salt, oil. Sure, we'd have to restock eventually, but it wouldn't be all at once. It is a bit sad how tough it is to get started: even a little jar of some of the most common herbs and spices can cost quite a lot, and it would take up a long time to save up enough money to build a decent collection of them.

I have decided that if I did have to redo this, the first thing I'd pick up would be some paprika or some pepper. After buying some salt, of course. Maybe I should have been a bit more inventive and gone to the beach and boiled some water for salt. MrFodder said I probably should have had more tap water, and not the filtered water we have in the office - which he did mention before I started, but I forgot.

I think it'd also be a bit easier if I could have butter, as you can buy a block of butter for less than I paid for oil, and butter also has a lovely flavour that it adds to foods that canola oil doesn't really do. Eggs were also something I was considering. I'm sad about how little tofu I got to eat as part of the challenge, but sometimes you have to make tough life choices.

I'm also incredibly grateful of the people who offered to buy me food while I was doing this. I know it's not a long-term solution, but it was touching to see the number of people who would be willing to lend a hand if required.

Which brings me to what made me decide to accept IP's challenge. A friend of mine recently told me that not long ago, he was barely scraping by. He was eating on roughly the amount I spent on food, and hid it from all of his friends. I felt pretty terrible. Here I am, with my "challenge" to spend $400 a month, and he's starving himself.

It makes me feel like I should be more extensive with my charity. I spend so much time and energy on things like finding the best cookie recipe. I think if I were to do something, I'd probably create a Spice program or something like that - where I'd sell smaller packets of spices, making it much easier for someone to get started on the journey of making their food taste better. I probably won't actually do it though, as I'm lazy.

Challenge result: FAILURE