If you're reading this, then it means that I am now married! That means MrMan5.5 has been promoted to MrFodder.
I think some of this post will be stolen and converted into my wedding speech.
So some of you might not know how MrFodder and I first met.
There was a duck farm that had just opened about an hour away from the city. The duck farm had an interesting promise - that you'd be able to find your lifelong partner at the farm. Sharon and Graham wanted to go, and I thought why not? At worst, maybe we could eat some delicious duck.
So off we drive to the duck farm, and when we got there there was a sign:
<----------- DUCKS FOR EATING
FIND YOUR TRUE LOVE ------>
We figured we could pick up a duck or two on the way out, but that we'd check out this true love thing since it seemed so silly. So we got into the line, paid $20 asked to go inside. The person at the counter said, "You'll find your true love at the last paddock, just make sure not to step on any ducks!"
Weird request, but OK. We walked through the gate into the first paddock and holy crap, so many ducks. There were ducks walking around everywhere. We carefully sidestepped past the ducks as we made our way towards the next paddock. We walked through the gate and there were even more ducks in the second paddock. It was a lot tougher this time, but we gave it our first shot. Unfortunately, Sharon tripped and ended up stepping on a duck on her way down. There was a loud noise - BEEEEP! Then two men come out dragging an ugly man with them. Possibly the ugliest man I've ever seen. They bring him up to Sharon and chain him up to her. "Congratulations, this is your true love." Sharon gives us a look saying, "Are you serious?" but before she can protest, the drag her out with her new partner. Graham and I try to follow, but the men stop us and say we must continue.
Left alone again in the paddock, Graham and I figure we might as well keep going. So we make it through the next gate, and in this paddock, there are even more ducks. It getting pretty difficult to avoid them, but with small shuffling steps, we make our way across. One of the ducks makes a loud quacking sound, and this startles Graham, who accidentally steps backwards onto a duck. BEEEEEEEEP! The two men come out again, this time dragging a man, uglier than the last one. "Congratulations, this is your true love." Graham slumps his shoulders and follows them, resigned to his fate.
Not wanting the same fate, I carefully make my way to the end of the paddock, and through two more until I find myself in an empty paddock. Two men come to greet me, saying that they will lead me to my true love. BEEEEEEEEP! The lead me out into one of the paddocks, though they tell me not to worry about the ducks, as I had already made it to the end. They led me towards this handsome man, the best looking man that I had ever seen. I was so happy. They chain me up to him and say, "Congratulations, this is your true love." The lead us out of the paddock into a restaurant and say that we should get to know each other over a nice duck meal. I introduce myself, and he responds that his name is MrFodder.
I get to know him, he's smart, he's funny, I'm having the time of my life. Then the waiter comes out with our meal, it's a roast duck. He says, "Congratulations to the both of you, here is the duck he stepped on."
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Jokes aside, there was a day, not long after we first got together, where we had spent the entire day in bed. Eventually, we got hungry and had our first argument - who was going to cook lunch? We weren't even talking a fancy lunch, just the instant Indomie mi goreng noodles. MrFodder's big argument was that I should do it because I'm the best at it. I don't know how you can be the best at boiling water and cooking noodles in a pot, but OK, I accepted that maybe he was a fail whale and I was better at cooking instant noodles than him.
During our relationship, I discovered that I was also the best at turning the lights off before bed, at going to the supermarket to buy snacks, baking cookies, it seemed that if there was anything MrFodder didn't want to do, I was the best at it!
We've been through a lot together. Supported each other in our final years of uni, and finding our first jobs. For a long time I was convinced that I'd never get a job. So many job applications and so many rejections. MrMan5.5 was always really supportive, and helped to keep my spirits up.
MrFodder is the kind of person who would stop his car to clear away a beer bottle in the middle of the road. At the same time, he's the kind of person who, if you say, "I'm hungry", will reply, "Nice to meet you Hungry, I'm MrFodder." Despite his horrible dad jokes, being with MrFodder makes me want to be a better person. I've a very picky eater, and I always order the same thing at restaurants, but he has made me eat more foods. It is because of him that I was brave enough to try what is now one of my favourite foods - taiyaki (a japanese pancake type thing with red bean paste inside). Speaking of Japan, on one of our trips, I wanted to go to the pokemon centre. It's only with MrFodder that I could set out looking for a toy shop and end up in the red-light district of Nagoya. But this story has a happy ending....we found the pokemon centre.
It was his idea to join a gym. We were both horribly unfit, and I still had the crazed notion that playing the Nintendo Wii was a good workout. I would often miss trains by a few seconds because I was too unfit to run 100m to the platform when I could hear the train coming. Now I am fit enough to run to the train station all the way from our house, and I can also do four push-ups!
There are many reasons that I decided to marry MrFodder. He makes me laugh, he is a good cook, he thinks that Tidehunter is a carry in Dota 2. But the main reason that I decided I want to spend the rest of my life with him is because he brings out the best in me.
Showing posts with label gratitude. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gratitude. Show all posts
Friday, 3 April 2015
Monday, 23 March 2015
People I am Grateful For - W, X, Y
I am grateful for you because in some ways, you were by best friend for a long time. When it was just me and you, we had to do everything together. We worked together to finish all kinds of video games, we made up our own fantasy games to play. I've always wondered if you ever felt sad that you were kinda living in my shadow, since you have the over achieving big sister, but it seems you've managed to surpass anything I've ever been able to do, so I'm glad you managed to find your own thing.
I am grateful that because of you, I always had a player 2. Even though I was bossy, and a sore loser, you still played with me. I'm grateful that despite what happened a long time ago, we ended up speaking to each other again. Even though we still don't talk all that often, I am glad that we can talk if we need to.
Playing with you made me strive to be better, so maybe it was me who was jealous of you and your natural gaming ability. I'm actually really ashamed of this, but whenever I worked out how to do something special in a game, I always kept it a secret. The various shortcuts in Mario Kart 64, how to do certain moves in fighting games, the location of body armour in Goldeneye (though you figured all of those out eventually), the list is so long. Although I guess with the Internet, none of that really matters anymore, since you can look anything up.
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This is also another pitiful one, because I think I probably win the award for worst sister ever. I'm grateful that after that night in the kitchen that everything managed to work out.
I'm grateful that you managed to find yourself as well.
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I'm grateful that you managed to hold the family together. Despite the horrible bullying we put you through, you always stayed cheerful. I'm grateful that you turned into a geek,
I remember when I found out about something you said in one of your therapy sessions - that you like being with me when I'm happy. When I'm not happy, you said you were scared of me. It's a pretty confronting thing to hear.
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I think this post should be more of an apology than things I'm grateful for. I'm sorry for being so caught up in myself and my own self-importance to be the big sister I should have been. Sometimes, it's not about being right or wrong, but about doing what needs to be done. W, I shouldn't have treated everything like a competition. Imagine how much more we could have done if we had worked together instead. X, instead of being so focused on myself, I should have realised that I had someone who looked up to me, and needed my help. You weren't an annoying brat that I had to put up with, you are a person, a real person, and I'm glad we didn't lose you. Y, you were bullied like crazy, and all you wanted was to be able to play with us. We treated you so horribly. Yet still, you somehow manage to act like a ray of sunshine with your deadpan humour. I don't know how you did it, but I have a great amount of respect for you, and I hope that you find it in yourself to forgive me for how I treated you as a kid someday.
I am grateful that because of you, I always had a player 2. Even though I was bossy, and a sore loser, you still played with me. I'm grateful that despite what happened a long time ago, we ended up speaking to each other again. Even though we still don't talk all that often, I am glad that we can talk if we need to.
Playing with you made me strive to be better, so maybe it was me who was jealous of you and your natural gaming ability. I'm actually really ashamed of this, but whenever I worked out how to do something special in a game, I always kept it a secret. The various shortcuts in Mario Kart 64, how to do certain moves in fighting games, the location of body armour in Goldeneye (though you figured all of those out eventually), the list is so long. Although I guess with the Internet, none of that really matters anymore, since you can look anything up.
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This is also another pitiful one, because I think I probably win the award for worst sister ever. I'm grateful that after that night in the kitchen that everything managed to work out.
I'm grateful that you managed to find yourself as well.
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I'm grateful that you managed to hold the family together. Despite the horrible bullying we put you through, you always stayed cheerful. I'm grateful that you turned into a geek,
I remember when I found out about something you said in one of your therapy sessions - that you like being with me when I'm happy. When I'm not happy, you said you were scared of me. It's a pretty confronting thing to hear.
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I think this post should be more of an apology than things I'm grateful for. I'm sorry for being so caught up in myself and my own self-importance to be the big sister I should have been. Sometimes, it's not about being right or wrong, but about doing what needs to be done. W, I shouldn't have treated everything like a competition. Imagine how much more we could have done if we had worked together instead. X, instead of being so focused on myself, I should have realised that I had someone who looked up to me, and needed my help. You weren't an annoying brat that I had to put up with, you are a person, a real person, and I'm glad we didn't lose you. Y, you were bullied like crazy, and all you wanted was to be able to play with us. We treated you so horribly. Yet still, you somehow manage to act like a ray of sunshine with your deadpan humour. I don't know how you did it, but I have a great amount of respect for you, and I hope that you find it in yourself to forgive me for how I treated you as a kid someday.
Sunday, 22 March 2015
People I am Grateful For - U, V
Nearly there, just a few more to go!
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I guess for starters, I should probably thank you for giving birth to me, as without you, I wouldn't even be here today, literally. I know it's been a tough journey, it can't have been easy to raise me, and I know that you did everything you could to give me a good childhood, even though I was a bit spoiled, being the eldest child. I'm sorry for disappointing you by refusing to learn Chinese. I know it must have hurt you a lot that I turned my back on my heritage.
I am grateful that you gave me the opportunity to learn. You used to walk me to the library at least once a week, and wait around with me for hours as I read and browsed books. I know we didn't have much money growing up, but you always found a way to entertain us despite that fact. You took us too all of those free shows that are put on by the various councils around the city - even though we complained once we started getting too old to go to those things, it was still very nice of you to do it.
You never wanted us to be sedentary children. Tennis lessons, karate lessons, swimming lessons, girl guide meetings, piano lessons. If there was a driving equivalent of frequent flyer miles, I'm sure you'd be platinum class now, as there was so much driving to take us to all the different things that we had to do. And you did it all on your own.
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You also had a hand in my existence, of which I am incredibly grateful. You are also the reason that I am a gamer, as you loved playing games. The day you brought home our first NES is still a very fond memory in my mind. We played duck hunt for so many hours, though it shames me to say that I still haven't finished Mario Bros (I think we only made it to world 5, as I looked up some pictures of world 6, and they don't look familiar at all).
For a long time, you were the only source of income for our family. You would leave for work at 4am, and return just before dinner. It makes me sad to think that I was scared of you for such a long time. Mum would never hit us, but if we misbehaved, she would threaten to tell you, and you would hit us with your belt when you got home. So there were many nights where I, or one of my siblings, had done something wrong, and so we'd all fear you coming home in the evening. I'm glad things between us have gotten a lot better since then.
Whenever I see people talking about having female role models for getting girls into IT, I think back to my own childhood, and I never had any, I just had you. You always shared your hobbies, like gaming, making model planes, tinkering with electronics, and it never mattered to you that I was a girl. You just thought it was something interesting, and you wanted to share. You never pushed me to play with dolls, even though all the other girls were doing it, but you bought me so many books on dinosaurs, and how things work.
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How do you sum up the contribution your parents have made to your life in a single blog post? I could probably sit here all day reminiscing. I can understand that it was difficult for them, as I recall believing that I'm so much smarter than them, and that they should be listening to me. And it might be true, when it comes to book-smarts, I'm probably miles ahead of them, as I had the good fortune of being able to attend university, but that doesn't mean that they don't know anything. Both of my parents have good hearts, and they did what they could given the circumstances. That's why I would really like to buy them a house, so that they can finally rest.
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I guess for starters, I should probably thank you for giving birth to me, as without you, I wouldn't even be here today, literally. I know it's been a tough journey, it can't have been easy to raise me, and I know that you did everything you could to give me a good childhood, even though I was a bit spoiled, being the eldest child. I'm sorry for disappointing you by refusing to learn Chinese. I know it must have hurt you a lot that I turned my back on my heritage.
I am grateful that you gave me the opportunity to learn. You used to walk me to the library at least once a week, and wait around with me for hours as I read and browsed books. I know we didn't have much money growing up, but you always found a way to entertain us despite that fact. You took us too all of those free shows that are put on by the various councils around the city - even though we complained once we started getting too old to go to those things, it was still very nice of you to do it.
You never wanted us to be sedentary children. Tennis lessons, karate lessons, swimming lessons, girl guide meetings, piano lessons. If there was a driving equivalent of frequent flyer miles, I'm sure you'd be platinum class now, as there was so much driving to take us to all the different things that we had to do. And you did it all on your own.
------------------------------------------------------
You also had a hand in my existence, of which I am incredibly grateful. You are also the reason that I am a gamer, as you loved playing games. The day you brought home our first NES is still a very fond memory in my mind. We played duck hunt for so many hours, though it shames me to say that I still haven't finished Mario Bros (I think we only made it to world 5, as I looked up some pictures of world 6, and they don't look familiar at all).
For a long time, you were the only source of income for our family. You would leave for work at 4am, and return just before dinner. It makes me sad to think that I was scared of you for such a long time. Mum would never hit us, but if we misbehaved, she would threaten to tell you, and you would hit us with your belt when you got home. So there were many nights where I, or one of my siblings, had done something wrong, and so we'd all fear you coming home in the evening. I'm glad things between us have gotten a lot better since then.
Whenever I see people talking about having female role models for getting girls into IT, I think back to my own childhood, and I never had any, I just had you. You always shared your hobbies, like gaming, making model planes, tinkering with electronics, and it never mattered to you that I was a girl. You just thought it was something interesting, and you wanted to share. You never pushed me to play with dolls, even though all the other girls were doing it, but you bought me so many books on dinosaurs, and how things work.
---------------------------------------------------------
How do you sum up the contribution your parents have made to your life in a single blog post? I could probably sit here all day reminiscing. I can understand that it was difficult for them, as I recall believing that I'm so much smarter than them, and that they should be listening to me. And it might be true, when it comes to book-smarts, I'm probably miles ahead of them, as I had the good fortune of being able to attend university, but that doesn't mean that they don't know anything. Both of my parents have good hearts, and they did what they could given the circumstances. That's why I would really like to buy them a house, so that they can finally rest.
Friday, 20 March 2015
People I am Grateful For - Q, R, S, T
In high school, you took me and a few other kids out of art class to attend your "puzzle club". We played trivia games, did brainteasers, and you entered us into a stock market game. I can't say I was all that sad about missing art class, and I really enjoyed myself in the puzzle club. It was in your club that I first discovered how much I love brainteasers, and puzzles in general. Despite how much crap my cousins give me for being bad at jigsaw puzzles, I love them. You made me sit my first IQ test, and the look of pride on your face when you saw my score was the first time I felt like someone was proud of me for being smart, without bragging about it to someone else.
You were the biggest influence on my career choice - telling me that I'd find working in a forensics lab incredibly boring. I know deep down that you were right, I really do, but at the same time, there is a bit of regret. But I am glad you did it, because, and I know this sounds sappy, but I'd never have met MrMan5.5 otherwise. I ended up moving away from hard science into software engineering, but perhaps my direction is still in forensics, just a different focus that's more than just running the same tests day after day after day.
You always pushed me. I wanted to do the "easier" maths and you didn't let me do it. I was always afraid to reach for a lofty goal, because I didn't want to fall short, and you pushed me to do it anyway. You always believed in my potential, and I was very lucky to have had you in my life.
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As stupid as this sounds, I always thought we were going to get married, even though we are cousins, because we were nearly the same age. You introduced me to Warcraft II, and later Starcraft, Knights of the Old Republic, and Beatmania. You lent me a DVD of the first anime I ever watched: Neon Genesis: Evangelion. You did kendo. I wanted nothing more than just to be like you. Admittedly, the only reason I joined the anime club and the kendo club at uni was because of you. However, I lasted two kendo lessons before deciding that swinging a bamboo sword down while yelling, "Men!" isn't really for me (men is Japanese for head, it's not some secret anti-men martial art).
Despite the fact that I didn't really manage to become nearly as awesome as you are, and we never ended up getting married, it is because of you that my life has been enriched by so many new things. Plus, I met a lot of great people along the way, so it's an interesting butterfly effect. You probably never knew that something as little as lending me a DVD could have had such a large impact on my life.
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If I could trade 6 years of university classes for 1 hour with you, I'm sure I'd still come out ahead, knowledge-wise. You made me into the software developer that I am today, and I don't mean that as an insult. You introduced me to the concept of test driven development. Your passion for your work, and your desire to produce quality software has had a big effect on me.
I don't know how many people know about this, but you are the reason that I am in the amazing team that I am in now. When I was due to roll of the grad program, I actually had two job offers, one for my previous team, and one for my current team. In fact, I got the job offer from the previous team before I started in my current team, so I started with the expectation that there was no point settling in, because I was just going to head back to my old team in six months. The first couple of months was just me being polite and trying to work out how I was going to tell my boss that I would be returning to my previous team. Until we had a few new people join the team, and the seating arrangement had to be changed to accommodate them. I was assigned to sit next to you.
Every day at work, I learned something new, and most of it wasn't even able software development! I loved listening to you talk about growing up in South Africa, and dealing with segregation. How despite everything, you've got such an open mind, and are incredibly kind. Your penchant for horrible movies, especially ones featuring sharks always brings a smile to my face. How you manage to find the craziest software development articles from some esoteric corner of the Internet. The thing that made me decide to stay was when I mentioned that I was interested in buying a Kindle, and you said that I could check yours out.and I found Liars and Outliers, by Bruce Schneier in your collection of books. That's when I reaslied that you are what I want to be when I grow up. Plus, my boss said that if I stayed in the team, I'd be tall like you some day. Still waiting on that one.
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Speaking of software quality, how could I go past my favourite quality assurance expert? Again, on the topic of people who are passionate about their work, you always come to mind. You love your work so much that you think about even when out at social events. I'm incredibly grateful that you suggested I go to the Limited WIP meet ups, as I learned so much about the agile methodology from those talks. Even if 80% of it washed over my head, the 20% that I did retain has helped me in my current job.
Despite being so much more experienced than me, you are always happy to explain basic concepts. You have so many interesting stories about agile development that it makes it easy to remember things. If I had half the passion that you have, I'd be set for life.
You were the biggest influence on my career choice - telling me that I'd find working in a forensics lab incredibly boring. I know deep down that you were right, I really do, but at the same time, there is a bit of regret. But I am glad you did it, because, and I know this sounds sappy, but I'd never have met MrMan5.5 otherwise. I ended up moving away from hard science into software engineering, but perhaps my direction is still in forensics, just a different focus that's more than just running the same tests day after day after day.
You always pushed me. I wanted to do the "easier" maths and you didn't let me do it. I was always afraid to reach for a lofty goal, because I didn't want to fall short, and you pushed me to do it anyway. You always believed in my potential, and I was very lucky to have had you in my life.
------------------------------------------------------------
As stupid as this sounds, I always thought we were going to get married, even though we are cousins, because we were nearly the same age. You introduced me to Warcraft II, and later Starcraft, Knights of the Old Republic, and Beatmania. You lent me a DVD of the first anime I ever watched: Neon Genesis: Evangelion. You did kendo. I wanted nothing more than just to be like you. Admittedly, the only reason I joined the anime club and the kendo club at uni was because of you. However, I lasted two kendo lessons before deciding that swinging a bamboo sword down while yelling, "Men!" isn't really for me (men is Japanese for head, it's not some secret anti-men martial art).
Despite the fact that I didn't really manage to become nearly as awesome as you are, and we never ended up getting married, it is because of you that my life has been enriched by so many new things. Plus, I met a lot of great people along the way, so it's an interesting butterfly effect. You probably never knew that something as little as lending me a DVD could have had such a large impact on my life.
-----------------------------------------------------------
If I could trade 6 years of university classes for 1 hour with you, I'm sure I'd still come out ahead, knowledge-wise. You made me into the software developer that I am today, and I don't mean that as an insult. You introduced me to the concept of test driven development. Your passion for your work, and your desire to produce quality software has had a big effect on me.
I don't know how many people know about this, but you are the reason that I am in the amazing team that I am in now. When I was due to roll of the grad program, I actually had two job offers, one for my previous team, and one for my current team. In fact, I got the job offer from the previous team before I started in my current team, so I started with the expectation that there was no point settling in, because I was just going to head back to my old team in six months. The first couple of months was just me being polite and trying to work out how I was going to tell my boss that I would be returning to my previous team. Until we had a few new people join the team, and the seating arrangement had to be changed to accommodate them. I was assigned to sit next to you.
Every day at work, I learned something new, and most of it wasn't even able software development! I loved listening to you talk about growing up in South Africa, and dealing with segregation. How despite everything, you've got such an open mind, and are incredibly kind. Your penchant for horrible movies, especially ones featuring sharks always brings a smile to my face. How you manage to find the craziest software development articles from some esoteric corner of the Internet. The thing that made me decide to stay was when I mentioned that I was interested in buying a Kindle, and you said that I could check yours out.and I found Liars and Outliers, by Bruce Schneier in your collection of books. That's when I reaslied that you are what I want to be when I grow up. Plus, my boss said that if I stayed in the team, I'd be tall like you some day. Still waiting on that one.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Speaking of software quality, how could I go past my favourite quality assurance expert? Again, on the topic of people who are passionate about their work, you always come to mind. You love your work so much that you think about even when out at social events. I'm incredibly grateful that you suggested I go to the Limited WIP meet ups, as I learned so much about the agile methodology from those talks. Even if 80% of it washed over my head, the 20% that I did retain has helped me in my current job.
Despite being so much more experienced than me, you are always happy to explain basic concepts. You have so many interesting stories about agile development that it makes it easy to remember things. If I had half the passion that you have, I'd be set for life.
Wednesday, 28 January 2015
People I Am Grateful For - N, O, and P
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We were brought together on that fateful enrolment day, you being one of the few other people who studied arts/engineering. You got me to sign up for the roleplaying club at uni, which ended up being a huge influence on my life. You were my inner nerd, you introduced me to a world filled with people like me, and at the risk of sounding emo, people who understood me. I actually dreamed about being at uni, studying by myself in the library every day, and all of those plans were ruined by you.
I remember being on a quest for a gay best friend, because it seemed like some manic pixie dream girl whimsical thing to do, and you made fun of me for it, and for the fact that someone who said he wasn't gay was going to be really sad because I thought he was. But funnily enough, it turns out I kinda completed my quest without knowing it.
You, "I" and I were my core friendship group throughout uni, and even though we didn't even study the same thing, we still managed to keep close the whole time. I am incredibly grateful that I had the two of you to get me through.
I really enjoy how much you make me think. You have a very unique view of the world (and I don't mean that in a bad way, it's just the incredibly combination of interests that you have make conversations with you always interesting, even though you and MrMan5.5 can never seem to agree). You're one of my favourite people to play the hypothetical game with.
Though I disagree with your views on fat people, some of your rants did motivate me to do some exercise, and I'm also grateful that you were willing to go running with slowpoke me. Even though I finally managed to get a 6 on the beep test, I still don't think I could outrun a crazy, angry gambler from the casino. Luckily for me, I'm not in that situation anymore.
I'm really grateful that I met you, I'm grateful for the social support I've received from you, and I'm grateful for you not spreading that story about me and the Spanish guy anymore.
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I thank you for understanding and supporting me during my career as a croupier, and for keeping me company while I was in vampire mode. It was hard explaining to some people that I take people's money for a living, but you never judged.
You also pushed me to get better at HoN and Dota 2.
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You were my first girl-gamer and programmer role model, proof that you can be a girl-gamer, work in IT, and not be completely socially maladjusted.
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"O" and "P", you two were my favourite UST entertainment, but in light of recent events, I've decided it's time to change the channel. I had planned to write a lot more about the two of you, but I just really don't feel very grateful right now. I enjoy spending time with you both, but I'm sorry, I need a break.
Oh, and "P", I lied to you. I do have balsamic vinegar at home - not because of MrMan5.5, but because I think it's delicious with salad. This is Australia, and you can buy it at the supermarket, and alarms don't go off "Beep beep beep, someone who isn't white is buying balsamic vinegar. Arrest them!"
We were brought together on that fateful enrolment day, you being one of the few other people who studied arts/engineering. You got me to sign up for the roleplaying club at uni, which ended up being a huge influence on my life. You were my inner nerd, you introduced me to a world filled with people like me, and at the risk of sounding emo, people who understood me. I actually dreamed about being at uni, studying by myself in the library every day, and all of those plans were ruined by you.
I remember being on a quest for a gay best friend, because it seemed like some manic pixie dream girl whimsical thing to do, and you made fun of me for it, and for the fact that someone who said he wasn't gay was going to be really sad because I thought he was. But funnily enough, it turns out I kinda completed my quest without knowing it.
You, "I" and I were my core friendship group throughout uni, and even though we didn't even study the same thing, we still managed to keep close the whole time. I am incredibly grateful that I had the two of you to get me through.
I really enjoy how much you make me think. You have a very unique view of the world (and I don't mean that in a bad way, it's just the incredibly combination of interests that you have make conversations with you always interesting, even though you and MrMan5.5 can never seem to agree). You're one of my favourite people to play the hypothetical game with.
Though I disagree with your views on fat people, some of your rants did motivate me to do some exercise, and I'm also grateful that you were willing to go running with slowpoke me. Even though I finally managed to get a 6 on the beep test, I still don't think I could outrun a crazy, angry gambler from the casino. Luckily for me, I'm not in that situation anymore.
I'm really grateful that I met you, I'm grateful for the social support I've received from you, and I'm grateful for you not spreading that story about me and the Spanish guy anymore.
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I thank you for understanding and supporting me during my career as a croupier, and for keeping me company while I was in vampire mode. It was hard explaining to some people that I take people's money for a living, but you never judged.
You also pushed me to get better at HoN and Dota 2.
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You were my first girl-gamer and programmer role model, proof that you can be a girl-gamer, work in IT, and not be completely socially maladjusted.
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"O" and "P", you two were my favourite UST entertainment, but in light of recent events, I've decided it's time to change the channel. I had planned to write a lot more about the two of you, but I just really don't feel very grateful right now. I enjoy spending time with you both, but I'm sorry, I need a break.
Oh, and "P", I lied to you. I do have balsamic vinegar at home - not because of MrMan5.5, but because I think it's delicious with salad. This is Australia, and you can buy it at the supermarket, and alarms don't go off "Beep beep beep, someone who isn't white is buying balsamic vinegar. Arrest them!"
Sunday, 25 January 2015
People I am Grateful For - K, L, and M
I'm grateful to you for having a WoW buddy for so long! I'm actually grateful for you to have the courage to stand for the things that you really care about, because I care about them, too, I'm just not as vocal about it because I don't want to be that guy. I think it's awesome that when you play Democracy, you also can't stomach the thought of implementing some of the policies, even though it'll make things much easier for you in the long run, because they clash with your personal ideals.
I admire that you don't care about being called a hipster, and you'll do what you want anyway. I could never do that. I can totally picture you as a sassy black woman who "don't need no man to take care of her" because that's just how you are. You like your independence.
I'm also grateful for having you as a gaming buddy. We've gone through some pretty poor games together (lol, Archeage). Here's to many more weird and wonderful games in the future - and to us inevitably playing the next WoW expansion!
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You were my first close male friend. When people ask if it's possible for a guy and a girl to be platonic friends, I wonder if we managed to pull it off. We were just two pals chilling, playing badminton, or Big 2. I felt like I could talk to you about everything (well, except things like periods, but I don't really want to talk about that with anyone, MrMan5.5 included). Even though I was a sad, tragic nerd, you always pushed me to do more exercise. There was the time you didn't have a textbook, so we ran all the way out to the bookstore to buy it, and all the way back. I thought I was going to die, but we made it back to class, barely.
We had a lot of fun times. Like that time in physics class where you were falling asleep, so you asked me to slap you. I didn't think you were joking, so I did, and it was a really loud slap that made the entire class stare at us. It was only afterwards that you told me that you were kidding. Oops! It wasn't all good times though. You asked me to take the UMAT with you, because you had your heart set on becoming a dentist, but you didn't want to do it alone. So I did. The day that the results came, I had the eagerness of someone who wanted to see what high scores they had achieved. I should have been a bit more sensitive to what you were going through. You were absolutely crushed when you opened your paper, and it was the first time I saw you cry. I'm kicking myself now for not helping you study for the test, how different things would have been. Sigh.
Unfortunately, your parents were moving back interstate, so at the end of Year 12, we bid farewell. And you were also the first guy to give me his number.... all six digits of it! So we never kept in touch. You also seem to share a first name with a lot of girls who like to pose in bikinis, so I always feel really seedy Googling you. For all the good times, Majump Jump.
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I definitely feel that without you, I wouldn't have this cushy job that I currently have. You agreed to be one of my references, and one who actually holds a bit of clout in the development world, so I'm sure that has played a big part in my work history. It's not just that though, I think you were one of the other people who has helped bring me and MrMan5.5 closer together, with your penchant for ... interesting anime. I have to say, that can girls one was pretty funny, despite how fanservicey it was. Funny in a "This is such a strange thing to turn into an anime" kind of way.
But it has been encouraging to know that despite being a complete failure in the year that you got to know me, I have grown into a far more competent developer, maybe one day even AJ will feel that I am worth his time! It's something to strive for anyway.
Sometimes I think that MrMan5.5 and I are slowly following in your footsteps, and it's good to know that we have a nice future to look forward to. Congratulations for the recent developments in your life, I hope to hear more good news from your direction in the future! Thanks again for believing in me, or letting me believe in you who believes in me.
I admire that you don't care about being called a hipster, and you'll do what you want anyway. I could never do that. I can totally picture you as a sassy black woman who "don't need no man to take care of her" because that's just how you are. You like your independence.
I'm also grateful for having you as a gaming buddy. We've gone through some pretty poor games together (lol, Archeage). Here's to many more weird and wonderful games in the future - and to us inevitably playing the next WoW expansion!
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You were my first close male friend. When people ask if it's possible for a guy and a girl to be platonic friends, I wonder if we managed to pull it off. We were just two pals chilling, playing badminton, or Big 2. I felt like I could talk to you about everything (well, except things like periods, but I don't really want to talk about that with anyone, MrMan5.5 included). Even though I was a sad, tragic nerd, you always pushed me to do more exercise. There was the time you didn't have a textbook, so we ran all the way out to the bookstore to buy it, and all the way back. I thought I was going to die, but we made it back to class, barely.
We had a lot of fun times. Like that time in physics class where you were falling asleep, so you asked me to slap you. I didn't think you were joking, so I did, and it was a really loud slap that made the entire class stare at us. It was only afterwards that you told me that you were kidding. Oops! It wasn't all good times though. You asked me to take the UMAT with you, because you had your heart set on becoming a dentist, but you didn't want to do it alone. So I did. The day that the results came, I had the eagerness of someone who wanted to see what high scores they had achieved. I should have been a bit more sensitive to what you were going through. You were absolutely crushed when you opened your paper, and it was the first time I saw you cry. I'm kicking myself now for not helping you study for the test, how different things would have been. Sigh.
Unfortunately, your parents were moving back interstate, so at the end of Year 12, we bid farewell. And you were also the first guy to give me his number.... all six digits of it! So we never kept in touch. You also seem to share a first name with a lot of girls who like to pose in bikinis, so I always feel really seedy Googling you. For all the good times, Majump Jump.
----------------------------------------
I definitely feel that without you, I wouldn't have this cushy job that I currently have. You agreed to be one of my references, and one who actually holds a bit of clout in the development world, so I'm sure that has played a big part in my work history. It's not just that though, I think you were one of the other people who has helped bring me and MrMan5.5 closer together, with your penchant for ... interesting anime. I have to say, that can girls one was pretty funny, despite how fanservicey it was. Funny in a "This is such a strange thing to turn into an anime" kind of way.
But it has been encouraging to know that despite being a complete failure in the year that you got to know me, I have grown into a far more competent developer, maybe one day even AJ will feel that I am worth his time! It's something to strive for anyway.
Sometimes I think that MrMan5.5 and I are slowly following in your footsteps, and it's good to know that we have a nice future to look forward to. Congratulations for the recent developments in your life, I hope to hear more good news from your direction in the future! Thanks again for believing in me, or letting me believe in you who believes in me.
Saturday, 24 January 2015
People I am Grateful For - J
When we first met, I was in a pretty unhealthy relationship, though I didn't know it at the time. We had "broken up" yet again as he hopped on a plane and flew to Spain, and I alternated between moping in WoW and moping in real life over how I was going to get him back (on the plus side, I finally managed to get to level 60). Those Korean panda trainers, I'll never forget that they were the reason we met.
I honestly cannot remember what we talked about, but I do remember that over time, we just kept talking more and more. One day, we were talking until quite late, and you mentioned you had a flying lesson pretty early in the morning. I told you to go to bed, but you wanted to keep talking. Eventually, we did sleep, and when I didn't hear from you for most of the next day, I thought the worst. I felt so relieved when I finally saw that popup saying you were online.
That began my addiction to seeing your name appear. I would get such a rush, and I always wanted to say, "Hi" as soon as I saw it, but I didn't want to appear like an overeager schoolgirl, so I'd battle with myself over how long to wait until I could open the chat window. Then you would say, "Hi!" and I'd feel like I could burst with happiness. We got to the point where we were going to exchange photos, but in the proviso that we duel each other in game. I dueled every rogue in my guild as preparation, and read so many priest vs rogue guides. You are the reason Shadow Word: Pain is bound to my fastest pressed key, and still is, as I trained myself to press it as soon as I heard that whooo (Youtube link) sound. Spin around while healing so you don't get gouged. Save fear for when you get kicked. DoT as soon as you can. Kite as much as possible.
It was all for nothing though, as I lost against you again and again. You had a picture of me, but I had none of you, which infuriatingly just added to your allure even more. I think you ended up sending one out of pity though, as I did get one, but I don't remember ever winning. You showed me that this is what it should feel like to love someone, not that you are their emotional dumping ground for how badly the world has treated them, and how you have to make them happy again.
You are also the first person I'd met who loves his job. Loves his job a lot - and still does, nearly 10 years later, according to your presentation at PAX. So much so that you even wrote your own games in your spare time, although a quick Google search shows that your webpage hasn't been updated in a few years, mostly because you're not allowed to anymore. You helped me get through algorithms, even though you detested the theory-heavy nature that my alma mater is famous for. You were the first to make me feel like programming as a career can be fun.
I wanted to say thank you to you, for bringing passion back to my heart, and to my work - I kinda like the fact that you've had such a big impact on my life, and we've still never met. I also wanted to say goodbye, because after hitting submit on this post, I am compartmentalizing you away. You are happily married, and judging by Facebook (you've locked yours down, but you should probably tell your wife not to share her stuff with the public), it looks like you just had your first child. I am soon to happily married. So long, and thanks for all the crippling poison to the face.
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I know that I said I'd think about sending some of these out to their intended recipients, but this is not going to be one of those.
I honestly cannot remember what we talked about, but I do remember that over time, we just kept talking more and more. One day, we were talking until quite late, and you mentioned you had a flying lesson pretty early in the morning. I told you to go to bed, but you wanted to keep talking. Eventually, we did sleep, and when I didn't hear from you for most of the next day, I thought the worst. I felt so relieved when I finally saw that popup saying you were online.
That began my addiction to seeing your name appear. I would get such a rush, and I always wanted to say, "Hi" as soon as I saw it, but I didn't want to appear like an overeager schoolgirl, so I'd battle with myself over how long to wait until I could open the chat window. Then you would say, "Hi!" and I'd feel like I could burst with happiness. We got to the point where we were going to exchange photos, but in the proviso that we duel each other in game. I dueled every rogue in my guild as preparation, and read so many priest vs rogue guides. You are the reason Shadow Word: Pain is bound to my fastest pressed key, and still is, as I trained myself to press it as soon as I heard that whooo (Youtube link) sound. Spin around while healing so you don't get gouged. Save fear for when you get kicked. DoT as soon as you can. Kite as much as possible.
It was all for nothing though, as I lost against you again and again. You had a picture of me, but I had none of you, which infuriatingly just added to your allure even more. I think you ended up sending one out of pity though, as I did get one, but I don't remember ever winning. You showed me that this is what it should feel like to love someone, not that you are their emotional dumping ground for how badly the world has treated them, and how you have to make them happy again.
You are also the first person I'd met who loves his job. Loves his job a lot - and still does, nearly 10 years later, according to your presentation at PAX. So much so that you even wrote your own games in your spare time, although a quick Google search shows that your webpage hasn't been updated in a few years, mostly because you're not allowed to anymore. You helped me get through algorithms, even though you detested the theory-heavy nature that my alma mater is famous for. You were the first to make me feel like programming as a career can be fun.
I wanted to say thank you to you, for bringing passion back to my heart, and to my work - I kinda like the fact that you've had such a big impact on my life, and we've still never met. I also wanted to say goodbye, because after hitting submit on this post, I am compartmentalizing you away. You are happily married, and judging by Facebook (you've locked yours down, but you should probably tell your wife not to share her stuff with the public), it looks like you just had your first child. I am soon to happily married. So long, and thanks for all the crippling poison to the face.
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I know that I said I'd think about sending some of these out to their intended recipients, but this is not going to be one of those.
Friday, 23 January 2015
People I am Grateful For - G, H, and I
You taught me the meaning of the word tomboy. You were crass, push, often inconsiderate, and so so very loud, but I have to say, you were the kind of friend who would go to the ends of the Earth for someone they considered a friend. You were the only other girl in our year to take year 12 physics, and we both had plans to go into engineering (though at the time, I also wanted to study mechatronics alongside you). You introduced me to Naruto, and were always trying to get me to go to the WWWA events. The day before our final chemistry exam, you convinced me and |b| to head over to Melbourne University to go to a marathon, and I won my very first anime wall scroll.
It's funny how those little things you don't think about much may have made a huge difference. If you had never gotten me into anime, I might have thought that MrMan5.5 was just some otaku loser. I probably never would have taken up Japanese and gone to Japan twice (and I still want to go back again for their delicious cup noodles and vending machine corn soup. Oh, and vending machine red bean drink. And how can you forget convenience store anpan? Plus warm, delicious curry udon).
It's because of you that I already had some friends at uni before I even started, as you, being the incredibly outgoing person that you are, had already scoped out all the cool clubs and started meeting new people - even though you ended up moving interstate to study law instead.
Thank you for being one of the butterfly flaps that ended up with me being in the happy situation that I am in now.
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We got to know each other during my darkest time. I refused to go to school, saw a bunch of therapists, I'm surprised at how many people jumped out of the woodwork to try and get me back on my feet, but I was being an emo little shit, and all I wanted was for it all to end. Except I was too cowardly, and couldn't face the pain that would come from something like cutting myself, or jumping onto the train tracks (though I did get pretty close to that one).
I knew of you, though since you taught ESL, and English is my first language, you never taught me. However, you did live 2 minutes from my house, and I don't know why, but you volunteered to drive me to school every morning. All of a sudden, it was an "authority figure" coming in every morning to drag my ass off to school, rather than my mum. I guess years of bowing to the power of teachers had me unable to pull the same, "Leave me alone" crap I did with my parents.
I was not very good at talking back then, but you gave me a notebook and told me that I should write things in it. Thus began my very first diary. In true emo fashion, I vented about how bad the world was, and how it felt like only I could see everything that was wrong, and why didn't anyone understand me?! After I was done, I gave it back to you for you to read. You wrote me a letter in response, and I don't remember a lot of it, but you addressed something that came up in my diary a lot. "A bore is a man who, when asked how he is, tells you" was one of my favourite quotes. I was absolutely convinced that I was a boring person of no consequence, and the world would probably be better off without me. Well, I alternated between that and saving the world with my crazy band-aid scheme. You told me that when someone meets you and finds you boring, that just means they do not find you interesting - it doesn't mean you are not an interesting person.
That advice really stuck with me, and I'm glad I never lived out my emo fantasies, as when I finally made it to university, I did meet people who found me interesting, or at least others who shared the same interests as me. So thank you, for turning my life around.
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It’s hard to boil down this friendship into a few moments that have meant a lot. I wouldn’t call us besties in the sense of “BFFS 4 LYF”, but I’ve always considered you my best friend. Despite some of the crappier things I’ve done, like be a complete lazy bum on a holiday in Queensland and drag you around to the dodgier part of Brisbane to meet some guy I met in a video game, you’ve never complained about anything. You just seem to take everything in your stride.
You're one of the most compassionate people I've ever met, and I think becoming a doctor is really suitable to your personality, so I'm glad you finally achieved your dream.
Oh! I'm also super grateful that you're a bit of a studying bum like me, and that we'd spend ages at the library not really doing anything. And you got me to read some pretty awesome books. I don't think I'd be half the bookworm that I am without your influence.
I don't really know what else to say, other than thank you for everything. I'm incredibly glad that one of the teachers decided to pair us together on orientation day.
It's funny how those little things you don't think about much may have made a huge difference. If you had never gotten me into anime, I might have thought that MrMan5.5 was just some otaku loser. I probably never would have taken up Japanese and gone to Japan twice (and I still want to go back again for their delicious cup noodles and vending machine corn soup. Oh, and vending machine red bean drink. And how can you forget convenience store anpan? Plus warm, delicious curry udon).
It's because of you that I already had some friends at uni before I even started, as you, being the incredibly outgoing person that you are, had already scoped out all the cool clubs and started meeting new people - even though you ended up moving interstate to study law instead.
Thank you for being one of the butterfly flaps that ended up with me being in the happy situation that I am in now.
---------------------------------------------------
We got to know each other during my darkest time. I refused to go to school, saw a bunch of therapists, I'm surprised at how many people jumped out of the woodwork to try and get me back on my feet, but I was being an emo little shit, and all I wanted was for it all to end. Except I was too cowardly, and couldn't face the pain that would come from something like cutting myself, or jumping onto the train tracks (though I did get pretty close to that one).
I knew of you, though since you taught ESL, and English is my first language, you never taught me. However, you did live 2 minutes from my house, and I don't know why, but you volunteered to drive me to school every morning. All of a sudden, it was an "authority figure" coming in every morning to drag my ass off to school, rather than my mum. I guess years of bowing to the power of teachers had me unable to pull the same, "Leave me alone" crap I did with my parents.
I was not very good at talking back then, but you gave me a notebook and told me that I should write things in it. Thus began my very first diary. In true emo fashion, I vented about how bad the world was, and how it felt like only I could see everything that was wrong, and why didn't anyone understand me?! After I was done, I gave it back to you for you to read. You wrote me a letter in response, and I don't remember a lot of it, but you addressed something that came up in my diary a lot. "A bore is a man who, when asked how he is, tells you" was one of my favourite quotes. I was absolutely convinced that I was a boring person of no consequence, and the world would probably be better off without me. Well, I alternated between that and saving the world with my crazy band-aid scheme. You told me that when someone meets you and finds you boring, that just means they do not find you interesting - it doesn't mean you are not an interesting person.
That advice really stuck with me, and I'm glad I never lived out my emo fantasies, as when I finally made it to university, I did meet people who found me interesting, or at least others who shared the same interests as me. So thank you, for turning my life around.
---------------------------------------------------
It’s hard to boil down this friendship into a few moments that have meant a lot. I wouldn’t call us besties in the sense of “BFFS 4 LYF”, but I’ve always considered you my best friend. Despite some of the crappier things I’ve done, like be a complete lazy bum on a holiday in Queensland and drag you around to the dodgier part of Brisbane to meet some guy I met in a video game, you’ve never complained about anything. You just seem to take everything in your stride.
You're one of the most compassionate people I've ever met, and I think becoming a doctor is really suitable to your personality, so I'm glad you finally achieved your dream.
Oh! I'm also super grateful that you're a bit of a studying bum like me, and that we'd spend ages at the library not really doing anything. And you got me to read some pretty awesome books. I don't think I'd be half the bookworm that I am without your influence.
I don't really know what else to say, other than thank you for everything. I'm incredibly glad that one of the teachers decided to pair us together on orientation day.
Wednesday, 21 January 2015
People I am Grateful For - D, E and F
I'm already bored of this topic, but the show must go on. 6 down, 20 more to go.
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We've been friends since before primary school, and it wasn't even me that did it, it was all you. You were like my guardian in primary school, as I was far too shy to make my own friends, so I just leeched off yours. You taught me drinking games, even though I am just as horrible at them now as I was the first time. I'm really glad I did not decorate your backyard with my dinner.
We grew apart once we moved to different schools, but we still stayed in contact with the occasional snail mail letter! It was always so fun to get a letter in the mail from you.
You were the cool big sister that I never had, and I'm grateful that I had you to take care of me. I wanted to ask you to be a bridesmaid at my wedding, to have someone from primary school, someone from high school, and someone from university, but you were having issues with your current partner at the time, so I didn't want to rub it in. However, you are also engaged now, and have bought your own house, which I think is awesome. I am glad things are looking up for you. :)
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When it comes to gamers, I often think of the 50 dkp minus guy (needs link here) yelling at his raid for not performing. I just thought this was the standard in the top raiding guilds, because you don't want to waste the time of 39 other people. We did have our 50 dkp minus guy, who I wrote to yesterday, but on the flip side, we had you. You weren't the guild leader, the raid leader, or even the mage leader, but everyone in the guild respected you and your skills. You always seemed to have an infinite level of patience, and I never once saw you rage.
You were the reason I wanted to get better at DotA. No matter how bad I was, you were always willing to play with me and get me to improve. Although to be honest, you carried me every game.
That day where we met up on Bored Aussies' Warcraft 3 server after we had both left WoW still shines in my memory. For the first time since those Tuesday WoW maintenance DotA matches, we were finally playing as equals and I felt so proud when we won the game.
DotA, and MOBAs in general, are famous for being really tough to get into, and full of vitriol for new players. Thank you for guiding me through that initial tough period, and for introducing me to one of my favourite games.
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I think we both have to admit that the school we went to was not of the greatest reputation. However, you managed to be one of the standout teachers in my memory. I remember cringing when at one of the parent-teacher days, my mum complained that I wasn't getting enough homework, and you told her that you'd find me more stuff to do. I dreaded science class because it just meant getting even more work, and I was afraid of people thinking I was a nerd because you were giving me extra work sheets to take home.
Fast forward to the last two years of high school, and the introduction of the standalone chemistry subject. I remember staying after school to talk over the theories on the structure of atoms with you. And how you told me about Schrodinger and his cat in a box thought experiment. Though I never progressed past a rudimentary understanding of quantum physics, it was amazing to see the way you lit up when you talked about it. And of course, your charming English accent made it all the more nicer to hear. Now that I have some friends who have become teachers, I realise how much of a sacrifice it was for you to stay back after school, since you were giving up your precious free time. So I really appreciate all that you did for me.
The fact that I never studied chemistry at uni still makes me sad now, and I know I could read up on it in my spare time, but I feel so lost now, and a lot of the things that I knew back then are completely foreign to me now.
---------------------------------------------
We've been friends since before primary school, and it wasn't even me that did it, it was all you. You were like my guardian in primary school, as I was far too shy to make my own friends, so I just leeched off yours. You taught me drinking games, even though I am just as horrible at them now as I was the first time. I'm really glad I did not decorate your backyard with my dinner.
We grew apart once we moved to different schools, but we still stayed in contact with the occasional snail mail letter! It was always so fun to get a letter in the mail from you.
You were the cool big sister that I never had, and I'm grateful that I had you to take care of me. I wanted to ask you to be a bridesmaid at my wedding, to have someone from primary school, someone from high school, and someone from university, but you were having issues with your current partner at the time, so I didn't want to rub it in. However, you are also engaged now, and have bought your own house, which I think is awesome. I am glad things are looking up for you. :)
---------------------------------------------
When it comes to gamers, I often think of the 50 dkp minus guy (needs link here) yelling at his raid for not performing. I just thought this was the standard in the top raiding guilds, because you don't want to waste the time of 39 other people. We did have our 50 dkp minus guy, who I wrote to yesterday, but on the flip side, we had you. You weren't the guild leader, the raid leader, or even the mage leader, but everyone in the guild respected you and your skills. You always seemed to have an infinite level of patience, and I never once saw you rage.
You were the reason I wanted to get better at DotA. No matter how bad I was, you were always willing to play with me and get me to improve. Although to be honest, you carried me every game.
That day where we met up on Bored Aussies' Warcraft 3 server after we had both left WoW still shines in my memory. For the first time since those Tuesday WoW maintenance DotA matches, we were finally playing as equals and I felt so proud when we won the game.
DotA, and MOBAs in general, are famous for being really tough to get into, and full of vitriol for new players. Thank you for guiding me through that initial tough period, and for introducing me to one of my favourite games.
---------------------------------------------
I think we both have to admit that the school we went to was not of the greatest reputation. However, you managed to be one of the standout teachers in my memory. I remember cringing when at one of the parent-teacher days, my mum complained that I wasn't getting enough homework, and you told her that you'd find me more stuff to do. I dreaded science class because it just meant getting even more work, and I was afraid of people thinking I was a nerd because you were giving me extra work sheets to take home.
Fast forward to the last two years of high school, and the introduction of the standalone chemistry subject. I remember staying after school to talk over the theories on the structure of atoms with you. And how you told me about Schrodinger and his cat in a box thought experiment. Though I never progressed past a rudimentary understanding of quantum physics, it was amazing to see the way you lit up when you talked about it. And of course, your charming English accent made it all the more nicer to hear. Now that I have some friends who have become teachers, I realise how much of a sacrifice it was for you to stay back after school, since you were giving up your precious free time. So I really appreciate all that you did for me.
The fact that I never studied chemistry at uni still makes me sad now, and I know I could read up on it in my spare time, but I feel so lost now, and a lot of the things that I knew back then are completely foreign to me now.
Tuesday, 20 January 2015
People I am Grateful For - B and C
I feel like a bit of a cop out, as looking at the word count provided by Wordpress, these posts are quite a lot shorter than my usual, so I'm combining two in one. Plus, that means this'll be over sooner and I can stop boring you all with them.
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You're an interesting one. I admit, I was scared of you for a very long time. You did not believe in kiddie gloves, and you never hesitated to give your honest opinion. At the time, I thought you were an asshole, but now I appreciate your honesty. You are still the best raid leader I have ever played with in any game. I remember after spending hours wiping on Princess Huhuran, everybody was so demoralised and we were just waiting for the call to end it for the night. But you said, "No." You said, "Harden the fuck up." (I feel like there should be a comma in there or something because it looks like it is telling someone to use harden on the fuck up.) We persevered for another two hours, but we did it.
Since then, when I have struggled, I hear your voice in the back of my head. "HARDEN THE FUCK UP." I'm pretty sure I have a recording of it somewhere. Way better than those white text on a black background with a picture of a waterfall posters. You probably don't know it, but you've helped me push myself further than I ever thought I could go.
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I wouldn't call us the closest of friends, as we probably see each other about three or four times a year, but you are definitely on my 3am trip to the airport list. What I admire about you the most is that you are like social lubricant. You have this magical effect to bring people together, and make them have a great time, just by being there. Sometimes I worry that it exhausts you, and that you might not like people dragging you out to things, as you often say, "No, I don't want to go.... No..... No.... OK, fine, I'll go." But you're a big boy now, and you can make your own decisions.
In the earlier stages of my relationship with MrMan5.5, things weren't as easy as they are now. I think we were still finding out feet, and we weren't as comfortable with each other. You probably felt a bit like a third wheel, but I feel that having you around helped us develop our history, and grow closer to each other.
And the crazy ideas. So many crazy ideas. The one I remember the most was that game we were going to make, which would have been something like Dungeon Defenders crossed with Line Tower Wars. At least that's how I pictured it. But you indulged me in everything, nothing was too crazy for us. Maybe that just means that we're both crazy. Who knows?
You were the inspiration for my push last year, to go out and be more social. Doing that has given me a huge boost of confidence. I really hope you were able to find that in yourself as well last year.
So thank you for helping me find (and keep) the most important person in my life, and thank you for helping me be the person that I am today (even if it's a little crazy). I hope one day to be able to return the favour.
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You're an interesting one. I admit, I was scared of you for a very long time. You did not believe in kiddie gloves, and you never hesitated to give your honest opinion. At the time, I thought you were an asshole, but now I appreciate your honesty. You are still the best raid leader I have ever played with in any game. I remember after spending hours wiping on Princess Huhuran, everybody was so demoralised and we were just waiting for the call to end it for the night. But you said, "No." You said, "Harden the fuck up." (I feel like there should be a comma in there or something because it looks like it is telling someone to use harden on the fuck up.) We persevered for another two hours, but we did it.
Since then, when I have struggled, I hear your voice in the back of my head. "HARDEN THE FUCK UP." I'm pretty sure I have a recording of it somewhere. Way better than those white text on a black background with a picture of a waterfall posters. You probably don't know it, but you've helped me push myself further than I ever thought I could go.
------------------------------------------------------------
I wouldn't call us the closest of friends, as we probably see each other about three or four times a year, but you are definitely on my 3am trip to the airport list. What I admire about you the most is that you are like social lubricant. You have this magical effect to bring people together, and make them have a great time, just by being there. Sometimes I worry that it exhausts you, and that you might not like people dragging you out to things, as you often say, "No, I don't want to go.... No..... No.... OK, fine, I'll go." But you're a big boy now, and you can make your own decisions.
In the earlier stages of my relationship with MrMan5.5, things weren't as easy as they are now. I think we were still finding out feet, and we weren't as comfortable with each other. You probably felt a bit like a third wheel, but I feel that having you around helped us develop our history, and grow closer to each other.
And the crazy ideas. So many crazy ideas. The one I remember the most was that game we were going to make, which would have been something like Dungeon Defenders crossed with Line Tower Wars. At least that's how I pictured it. But you indulged me in everything, nothing was too crazy for us. Maybe that just means that we're both crazy. Who knows?
You were the inspiration for my push last year, to go out and be more social. Doing that has given me a huge boost of confidence. I really hope you were able to find that in yourself as well last year.
So thank you for helping me find (and keep) the most important person in my life, and thank you for helping me be the person that I am today (even if it's a little crazy). I hope one day to be able to return the favour.
Monday, 19 January 2015
People I am Grateful For - A
To follow on from my post of a couple of days ago, I thought I'd start writing thank you letters to some of the people I'm grateful to have, or have had, in my life. Perhaps a lame way to get 26 blog posts out of it (because there are 26 letters of the alphabet, and I had to pick some sort of limit), but I think that it's nice to reflect on some of the good things that have happened, because it becomes far too easy to just remember the negative things. One day, if I ever become brave enough, I may even end up sending some of these letters to their intended recipients, but I'm afraid it might be too weird, and they might say, "Lol, umm... why are you saying all this stuff? Are you dying?" and it might possibly fuel those cancer rumours. :( If I don't end up writing something to you, that doesn't mean I don't value you in my life. I was just thinking about some of the people in my life who have been a turning point of some kind for me.
OK, let the games begin!
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I've struggled with self-motivation a lot in the past, and I know my weight has been something I've wanted to get under control, but never been able to. But for the past couple of years, you've really helped me get through it. Seeing your own journey to slim down helped a lot, as I knew that you knew what I was going through. Mostly importantly, it was that you never made me feel bad about myself, and you constantly reiterated, "Do it for yourself". There were a lot of Mondays where I came into work and told you about how I did not go to the gym, and the horrible foods I ate, and still, you never chastised me. You just told me to keep going.
I kept waiting for the stick, and it never came. Then one Monday, as I was preparing to type another summary of my bad weekend to you, it just hit me. Is this what I really want to do? I could hear the voice of one of my best friends, telling me about his total disdain for fatties. I could hear the kids at the supermarket saying, "Why don't we ask the fat lady?" (In reference to me.) But that wasn't enough. I eventually decided that I did want to lose weight, and not to avoid the scathing remarks from others, but for myself.
I wanted to say thank you, for pushing me to push myself, and for never losing faith in me.
OK, let the games begin!
----------------------------------
I've struggled with self-motivation a lot in the past, and I know my weight has been something I've wanted to get under control, but never been able to. But for the past couple of years, you've really helped me get through it. Seeing your own journey to slim down helped a lot, as I knew that you knew what I was going through. Mostly importantly, it was that you never made me feel bad about myself, and you constantly reiterated, "Do it for yourself". There were a lot of Mondays where I came into work and told you about how I did not go to the gym, and the horrible foods I ate, and still, you never chastised me. You just told me to keep going.
I kept waiting for the stick, and it never came. Then one Monday, as I was preparing to type another summary of my bad weekend to you, it just hit me. Is this what I really want to do? I could hear the voice of one of my best friends, telling me about his total disdain for fatties. I could hear the kids at the supermarket saying, "Why don't we ask the fat lady?" (In reference to me.) But that wasn't enough. I eventually decided that I did want to lose weight, and not to avoid the scathing remarks from others, but for myself.
I wanted to say thank you, for pushing me to push myself, and for never losing faith in me.
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