I think I had my first nearly-Bridezilla moment on Sunday. Responses to our wedding invitation are starting to come in. Some of my family members aren't able to make it because they're too old and don't feel comfortable making the drive. Some will be overseas at the time. All understandable stuff. However, when my mum told me that my aunt said she isn't able to come because she has patients booked all the way up until April, my BS alarm was going off at full volume. And so was hers, she looked really upset that my aunt (my dad's sister-in-law, not mum's) wasn't going to make it.
At the time, I felt really petty. I planned to call up her office and try to make an appointment on the day of our wedding. Then, assuming I am correct and her excuse is a complete lie, would leave my name as Myaunt Isaliar. She has had four months' notice of the date of our wedding, and I admit, I am not familiar with how far in advance some people book their appointments, but four months sounds like a bit of a stretch. e piano lessons), she says that she is always happy to babysit her grandchildren at short notice.
MrMan5.5 asked me if I would have preferred if she had just told me, "I don't want to go to your wedding," and it might sound strange, but I'm leaning towards yes. At least I could have asked her why, and if there was an issue, we could have worked to resolve it. Now I am just left to figure out why.
I'm pretty sure it's because we said no children under the age of 3 are allowed to our wedding, which means her daughter can't come, as she has a one-year-old child, and just gave birth to another. This was not intended as a child-free rant, but I have a feeling it's going to turn into one. To be honest, I don't understand the fascination with newborns. People always hand me one like it's the biggest joy in the world to be holding their baby, and all I can think is, "I don't want to drop this thing." I am in terror the entire time. Maybe it'd be different if I had kids, but right now, I really struggle to understand.
Though that's not even why we put it there, the venue requests that we don't have children under the age of 3. Maybe because they don't have baby changing facilities, or maybe because they don't want to have to cater for them, I don't know, we never asked.
Anyway, I saw the light, and regardless of what my aunt's real reason for not wanting to attend our wedding is, I should just accept that she doesn't want to come. I am the queen of holding grudges, but this probably isn't a good time to start one. They are family after all. Blood is thicker than water. If they don't want to come, then it just means that we can invite other people who might actually like us. A part of me is a bit sour that she couldn't even tell me to my face (as we saw each other at a different cousin's engagement party), and had to say it to my mother instead, but again, just going to live with it. I'm not owed an explanation, they can do whatever they want.
Another reason I thought of is that maybe they are a bit short of money at the moment. Which would make sense as a reason they'd lie about, because it's embarrassing to admit that you are tight with money. I can sort of see it being the case, as their daughter is not working at the moment due to taking care of her kids, and I don't think her husband is employed. That's probably the reason I'll go with in my head, even if it's not too likely given other circumstances. Why attribute to malevolence what can be explained by something less harmful, like shame?
Oh, her husband called me a hippie when I was 12-years-old and talked about donating to the Red Cross. So maybe they really do hate me. I guess I'm just not used to being hated.
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