Henny Penny

Another one from the drafts folder, from quite a few years ago! Too busy playing Dota and making bad vegan, gluten-free gingerbread today.
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I went to a friend's bachelorette party a few nights ago, and she got us to sit in a circle and go around saying things about her. Somehow, the topic changed to why she was marrying her soon-to-be husband, and she hesitated for a very long time then said, "It just happened." Everyone was shocked at the answer. How can your reason for marrying someone be because it just happened (we ruled out the shotgun wedding as both of them are very religious - though someone did ask and she adamantly denied it)? Personally, I think the question isn't that easy to answer. I could say MrMan5.5 is nice, funny, smart, etc., but so are many other people in the world, so what makes me want to be with MrMan5.5 more than anyone else?

Some of the bride-to-be's friends weren't so shy about their opinions, and they demanded to know why she was going through with the wedding if she couldn't even give a reason for wanting to marry her fiance. They said that as her friends, they didn't want her to get married because she felt an obligation to get married, but because she wanted to, and from what she was saying, we pretty much got the impression that she wasn't entirely sure that she wanted to. Some of her friends were even pressuring her to rethink the wedding. Is that what friends are meant to do? Do friends really know what's best?

I think that if MrMan5.5's friends were to look at our relationship, they would think that I was bad for him, as I am usually quite mean to him and tease him almost all the time, but we are different when we are alone together. None of our friends see when he is there for me when I am having troubles with my family, or how he always makes sure that I am OK. So how can they really judge if he is the right one for me?

I wonder what my friend thinks of us now. I hope she doesn't decide to cancel the wedding because of us, and then regret it for the rest of her life. I think there is definitely a threshold, for instance, if one partner was extremely abusive, or secretly cheating, I'd definitely tell my friend, and I'd hope my friends would do the same for me. However, seemingly incompatible personality is a tough one. There is a lot that goes on behind the scenes, and it's almost impossible to have the full story. Plus, if you're only friends with one side of the couple, then you're only ever going to get their version of the events anyway. Still, when it comes to big decisions like marrying someone, you'd want to know that your friend is making the right decision, right?

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Well, a few years later, and I guess a lot has changed. The wedding was not cancelled, and they got married and have a kid together now. The rest is what I've heard from mutual friends, as I have not seen them since.

The mother-in-law told the soon-to-be-groom about the hen's night, and he was considering cancelling the wedding - let's just say, the bride-to-be got quite familiar with the stripper under a towel (she's the reason I am 100% against having a stripper if I even have a hen's night). There was a lot of shouting and bringing up things that happened in the past, and of course, lots of blaming. I guess the whole thing made he realise she did want to marry him, as otherwise, she had just found an out - though a rather shameful one at that. Who wants to be the person who got dumped the night before her wedding because of a stripper?

More hearsay: things aren't going all that well between the two. She is not too happy about his job, and even her sisters-in-law, who she had grown quite close to, don't really speak to her that often anymore, as they think she's a bit of a diva.

Looking at Facebook, it seems like they are enjoying their marriage to each other. Though I guess that goes back to what I said earlier: it's hard to judge what's really going on under the covers.

If someone were to ask the question to me, I'm not sure I could answer off the top of my head. I've been sitting here for 20 minutes writing this post, you'd think something would have come to me. I guess I just want to spend the rest of my life with MrMan5.5. He makes me happy (most of the time), and I think that I make him happy, too. I really like snuggling up with him in bed (except on stinking hot days like today), and it makes me feel happy that he's there next to me when I wake up in the morning. I like that he's always willing to try my cooking, even though it sounds horrible. I just really like a lot of stuff about him, and I can't imagine life without him. Though that all sounds really sappy, and I'd feel incredibly embarrassed saying that to people in real life. So maybe my friend has her reasons, but she considers them private. I'm glad I didn't pressure her to delay the wedding.